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Friday, November 30, 2001

Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

KID ROCK
'Cocky'
(Atlantic)

Kid Rock starts with a notion we all probably shared: That he was a one-off. That he'd get fat and happy and retire to his white trash paradise possibly to be seen but never to be heard from again.

It's downright hard to picture the trailer park beastie boy from Detroit Rock City actually taking time out to cut a new album. He's already got Pamela Anderson. What else does he need?

No one is more aware of this than Kid Rock himself, so he addresses that up front on "Cocky," the follow-up to his 10-times platinum breakthrough "Devil Without a Cause," rapping, "Thought I'd get dusty/thought I'd get rusty/thought I'd get rich and quit/Or he must be/fat and ugly/broke, black and blue/But I'm trim, fit, rich and I'm back for Round Two."

Kid and his Twisted Brown Truckers return with such a roundhouse of hip-hop grooves, pile-driving metal riffs, Southern twang, jazzy bursts, bustin' rhymes, bad-mutha attitude and honest-to-goodness songs and melodies that he's right when he says it's OK to be cocky if you can back it up.

The multi-instrumental Kid Rock really is a creation of his own. Who else, besides maybe that Everlast dude, is going to pull off duets with Sheryl Crow (pretty) and Snoop Dogg (profane)? Who else brings that Skynyrd-meets-Jay-Z-meets-Aerosmith-meets-Iggy-at-the-trailer-park-in-a-limo kind of sensibility?

None of this all-out obnoxiousness would fly if Kid Rock's wasn't such a cartoon character. He's bigger than life, and funnier than most of it, too. When he gets serious, like on the religious ballad "Lonely Road of Faith," he quickly goofs or rocks his way out. And when he gets too cocky, he knows when to cut himself down.

As he tells us in "Lay it on Me," "I got rich offa keepin' it real, while you Radioheads are reinventin' the wheel."

Sure enough, no one is confusing the two. But if it's a joy ride you want, let Kid Rock be your driver. And oh, before you put "Cocky" under the Christmas tree, be advised that the Parent Advisory is well earned. Your parents won't wanna hear this.

-- Scott Mervis

MICK JAGGER
'Goddess in the Doorway'
(Virgin)

Unless I read the credits wrong, Mick Jagger didn't need the dude from matchbox twenty's help to co-write all those classic songs on "Let It Bleed" or "Beggars Banquet."

Why start now?

I blame $antana.

And those stupid Grammys.

Jagger clearly wants a "Smooth."

And what he's written here with Mr. Smooth himself is "Smooth," all right. But that's the problem. Smooth, commercial, ordinary pop with decent odds of garnering a lot of airplay at the moment does not suit a man of Jagger's wealth and taste, much less a man of Jagger's talent. This is homogenous sham rock. All about the Benjamins. A sell-out, plain and simple. And what's really sad is, half the time, he doesn't even get it right. The man is obviously shooting for contemporary hit appeal on the opening song, the one he wrote with Mr. Smooth, and yet, the chorus sounds remarkably like "Downtown Train," a 1989 Rod Stewart single.

On "It's Only Rock 'n' Roll" (a better album old Jann Wenner oughtta have his critics reassess in that next Rolling Stone Record Guide now that he's gone and slapped his five-star rubber stamp on this), he covered "Ain't Too Proud to Beg." But that was years ago. Today, the man is too proud not to beg. He wants a hit. It's been 12 years. And if that means he has to call in hacks like Marti Frederiksen -- the brains, or lack thereof, behind the latest Aerosmith -- and Wyclef Jean, well, that's the price his fans are gonna have to pay.

It's sad, especially on songs where you can hear the process turn from art to product by the time you hit the chorus.

There are glimmers of the Glimmer Twin's old magic here. The cut he wrote with Lenny Kravitz does a nice job of recycling the vibe of "Gimme Shelter" -- and smoothing the edges, of course, for airplay. "Everybody Getting High," with Frederiksen associate Joe Perry joining in, is stupid fun, at least. And "Too Far Gone," the best cut here, finds Jagger looking back on days that "all screamed by so fast." A "Through the Past Wistfully" ballad, it takes the listener from "I always hate nostalgia/living in the past" to the heartbreaking realization that "We're hostage to the past."

And Jagger's past presents an especially sticky hostage situation. Is it fair to hold his latest album up to "Beggars Banquet" for comparison? Sadly, for Jagger, it is. So that's his cross to bear. But selling out is not the answer.

-- Ed Masley

BRITNEY SPEARS
'Britney'
(Jive)

She's not a girl, not yet a woman. Not that innocent, as noted on her last release. But like a virgin. Not just any virgin, though. Like a virgin from Lady Madonna's School of Hot and Bothered Virgins -- holding out the promise of a breakthrough, if you will, like all the greatest teases in the history of Catholic-schoolgirl-skirt manipulation.

"I'm a Slave 4 U" is Britney's finest hour, steamier than anything she's ever done -- on record anyway -- more Cinemax than HBO, with Britney purring "Don't you want to dance up on me" in a voice that leaves you wondering why the hell she had to bother asking in the first place. Everything about the track is sex, from Britney's agitated vocals to the Neptunes' harem-rocking orgy beat. It's Britney's careless whispers on the dance floor, though, that really make it sizzle. "Do you like it?" Cut to heavy breathing. "This feels good."

Madonna only wishes she could be this sexy.

But enough about the single.

Britney hits you, baby, more than one more time on this, the most consistent effort of her 19 years on Earth.

The second cut, "Overprotected," finds her shaking off the shackles of her teen-queen kingdom with "I need to make mistakes just to learn who I am/And I don't want to be so damn protected." It's a new teen anthem, with Swedish production that marries the sound of Britney's first two albums to the killer hooks of old-school Swedish rockers Abba.

"Lonely" rides a sexy Rodney Jerkins groove down Lonely Street to Independence Hall. On "Boys," she brings the steam of "I'm a Slave 4 U" to Janet Jackson's nasty boys with funky bass that dares you not to shake it, Britney whispering "You know I need you" while looking to "turn this dance floor into our own little nasty world." "Anticipating" adds the feel of classic disco to her bag of tricks, while "I Love Rock 'n' Roll" is every bit as rock 'n' roll as Joan Jett's single ever was. And so much more. It rocks the speakers like a hip-hop remix of an old Black Sabbath single with a female porn-star in for Ozzy. Other highlights range from "Let Me Be," a soulful ballad with quirky production, to "Cinderella," yet another Abba-esque production from Swedish svengali Max Martin.

And the downside? Only one real dog, "I'm Not A Girl, Not Yet A Woman," the worst sort of syrupy, melodramatic ballad and the only cut that finds her playing to the little girls who made her what she is. They'll eat it up. As will the older listeners who made Shania Twain a star.

But Britney's future lies in the Prince-ly abandon of "Boys" and "I'm a Slave 4 U." And Britney knows it. Now dig, if you will, her stomach.

-- Ed Masley