Homemaking: Taking rich kids to school
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Over my morning coffee, I read in my paper that parents in New York City are all a-twitter because tuitions at most private schools are just about to creep past the $40,000 mark. I stared at the story for a full minute before it hit me: They weren't talking about college costs (otherwise known as the monster under every American parent's bed). They were talking about tuition at regular old K-12 schools (otherwise known as the place your kid goes to get some reading, writing and arithmetic).
According to the article, that 40K figure is often just the base fee. Well-to-do parents are also forking out money for fundraisers, activity fees and special tutors, all in the hopes of making sure that their kids will one day be the boss of your kids. (Students at these swanky schools are expected to bring their own silver spoons and can save money by sitting on a stick before enrolling.)
One preschool (preschool!) is charging close to $40,000. Considering that preschoolers do little more than take naps, finger paint and sing songs while wearing crudely constructed paper hats, that's kind of steep.
I did a quick calculation, and these parents will pay almost a half-million dollars in tuition and fees just to get their offspring to high school graduation. Most of the better schools have waiting lists, though, with parents obsessing on school choice almost from the moment the OB/GYN says, "I can see the head!" In one of the most bizarre aspects of this situation, parents are shelling out more than $21,000 for private consultants to help 4-year-old Muffy or Chad get into the best kindergartens in the city.
Now to be fair, I don't have a lot of exposure to ritzy private academies. I know something about them because I have seen four of the seven Harry Potter movies. (At least I'm pretty sure. I might have seen one of them twice, but they are sort of confusing.) If you took away the magic and Quidditch, though, Hogwarts didn't seem all that nice, and the sweaters looked downright uncomfortable.
All of the McKays, my wife and I and all of our assorted and sundry children, have attended public schools, where the only entrance requirement was an updated shot record. (Interestingly enough, it's also the only requirement to get an appointment for your dog at the pet groomers.) So we can't really relate.
First Published February 4, 2012 12:00 am
