His overly passionate kisses leave her cold
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DEAR CAT: Is it terrible to break up with someone for being a bad kisser? My friends think I'm being too hard on this guy, but, seriously, kissing him is so frustrating. We've had four dates, and I don't know if I can tolerate much more until this is under control. Can I tell him that I can't stand his kissing? I'd feel bad doing that because he likes me so much, and I do like him, too, but it's to the point where I dread the end of our dates and the goodnight kiss. I'd describe his kissing as "all over the place." It's just too eager and messy, and it kind of grosses me out. What would you do? -- HELP MY MOUTH!
Pittsburgh Post-Gazette
34 Blvd. of the Allies
Pittsburgh, Pa. 15222
DEAR HELP: I'm with you, bad kissing is a horrible thing to contend with, but on the plus side it's usually correctable. If bad kissing is the only thing wrong with this guy, give him a chance to redeem himself. Yes, you're allowed to say something to him, but don't tell him he's an awful kisser -- yet. Instead, tell him how you want to be kissed. Then, show him. Give him a couple of rounds to catch on. If he rejects your tutelage and insists on mopping your face, feel free to end it. But ...
CAT'S CALL: Make sure to tell him why.
DEAR CAT: A few months ago my friend invited my family to an event where she was being recognized. Afterward she said she wanted to "have us for lunch," which I assumed meant lunch at her house. Instead, we went to a cafeteria nearby and she walked away after paying for her food. So, I paid for ours. I was a little taken aback but dismissed it. Recently our families were together, and I invited them to our house to hang out. She suggested getting a to-go order on the way there, but when the time came to pay she didn't offer any money. We were taking the food back to my house, but it was her suggestion. Had I known I'd be footing the entire bill, I would have made something for half the cost. I don't want to speak up this long after the fact, but I'd appreciate advice on dealing with this in the future. -- MANNERS, ANYONE?
DEAR MANNERS: We've all known those people. They rally everyone for a plan then sit on their hands when the bill comes. Or not leave a tip at a group dinner. Or you take a group road trip but they never chip in for gas. There's one word to describe these people: cheap. Cheap people will take as much as they can and feel no remorse about it, even if they enjoy your company. It doesn't make you a gracious host to cover their tab; it makes you a doormat. In the future, if she suggests a plan, don't hesitate to ask for her share of the bill and don't feel guilty about it. By the way, you call her a "friend," but if she's happy to stick you with her social bills ...
CAT'S CALL: It's time for a demotion to "acquaintance."
First Published April 26, 2011 12:00 am
