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Sunday, December 09, 2001

Twenty-seven years ago this New Year's Eve, the New York Yankees and then novice owner George Steinbrenner signed Catfish Hunter -- their first and the game's first free agent -- to a five-year, $3.75 million contract. (Oh, for the good ol' days.)

Their next three signings brought them Don Gullett (1976), Reggie Jackson (1976) and Goose Gossage (1977) and, in turn, the 1977 and '78 world championships.

So began the perception that Yankees money could seduce any player The Boss desired. A perception likely to be perpetuated any day now when Jason Giambi shaves off his whiskers, buys a necktie, says goodbye to his psychic and heads east for about 125 million of those Yankees dollars.

"He seems like our kind of warrior," The Boss told Newsday.

A little too much chest-thumping for your small-market taste this morning? Allow The Guy In The Stands to freeze George in mid-thump by asking: Weren't Claudell Washington and Len Sakata his warriors, too? And Pascual Perez and Steve Kemp? And Rod Scurry and Mel Hall?

Like Catfish and Reggie, they are among the 72 recipients of the roughly three-quarters of a billion free-agent dollars Boss Steinbrenner has shelled out in pursuit of champagne showers in October.

Unlike Catfish and Reggie, they are signings he would just as soon we forget. Which is all the more reason to prick the Yankees with a reminder of their worst signings on this weekend when they celebrate what figures to be one of their best. It's small-minded, cheap comfort ... but hey, this is a small market.

5) Henry Rodriguez, OF, Jan. 1, 2001. ... He was given $850,000 and expected to fill the left-handed part of their DH equation last season. He batted eight times through June 4, struck out in six of them and was gone by midseason.

4) Dave Collins, OF, Dec. 23, 1981. ... A .276 career hitter with versatility and speed in Cincinnati, he signed a three-year deal for $2.25 million. His average dropped 20 points, his stolen base numbers dropped, his run-producing numbers dropped and before 1983 arrived he was dropped. His signing heralded 12 years of darkness in which the club not only didn't win a world championship, but it also didn't make the postseason.

3) Pascual Perez, P, Nov. 21, 1989. ... Signed a three-year, $5.7 million contract. Pitched 87 innings, won three games and was gone after two years.

2) Kenny Rogers, P, Jan. 4, 1996. ... A 14.14 earned run average in the '96 postseason and a 6-7 start in '97 in which he was shuffled to the bullpen, the doghouse and Coney Island to keep him out of George's sight had The Boss asking everyone but the Salvation Army to take the heartless left-hander off his hands.

1) Ed Whitson, P, Dec. 27, 1984. ... Did someone say heart? Signed for $4.5 million over five years. Despite a 15-10 record in pinstripes, one not so-insignificant flaw went undetected in his pre-signing physical -- he was born minus the steely intestines needed to play in New York. It got to the point where Manager Lou Piniella would avoid starting him at home. He is easily still the standard for disappointment in The Bronx.

Dollar for doll

In explaining his injunction of Nov. 16 that forces the Twins to play in the Metrodome in 2002, Hennepin County (Minn.) Judge Harry Seymour Crump wrote: "The welfare, recreation, prestige, prosperity, trade and commerce of the people of the community are at stake. The Twins brought the community together with Homer Hankies and Bobblehead dolls." Don't know about you, but isn't it a bit scary to consider that a spring-headed, 6-inch ceramic figurine can factor into the destiny of a multibillion-dollar business.

Bo-dacious

Ginger or Mary Ann? It wasn't a party-game question for Bo Belinsky (28-51 with six teams from 1962-70). For Belinsky, who insists he "got more mileage winning 28 games in the majors than most guys who've won 200," it was real life in the 1960s. Unlike tens of thousands of men and their fantasies, he actually dated actress Tina Louise, Ginger's alter-ego. Onetime pinups Ann-Margret, Mamie Van Doren and Connie Stevens, too. And when it came time to settle down, he married -- and then divorced -- a Playboy playmate of the year. For that all-star lineup alone, Belinsky, who died of a heart attack Nov. 23, deserves a special Guy In The Stands thumbs up before any more time passes.

Recalls Buck Rodgers, a teammate with the Los Angeles Angels and the catcher the night Belinsky captured the imagination of Hollywood by no-hitting the Orioles as a rookie in 1962: "My locker was next to Bo's. I'd come in and put on my uniform and, of course, I'd put on my cup. ... Bo never even wore underwear! I said, 'Bo, maybe -- maybe -- you want to borrow this and protect yourself. You've got a lot more things to do after the ballgame than I do.'"

People will pay

How much will people pay for a piece of Americana? The Cubs bumped the price of a fabled bleacher seat to $24 for 2002. That's two-thirds the price of a premium box seat at Wrigley, or just $3 less than an infield box seat at PNC Park.

Meeting points

Baseball's winter meetings begin tomorrow in Boston. ... The Red Sox are looking to deal troublesome Carl Everett, but would you like to be the GM who has to go home to his marketing department and tell them to build a campaign around the oft-fined, oft-suspended, oft-late, crotch-grabbing center fielder? Of course, it does present a novel promotional idea: Bobblehead-Butting Doll Giveaway Night. ... Angels closer Troy Percival, whose contract is up after 2002 and who is still upset over the way the club handled negotiations for an extension late in the season, is available for the right price. ... The Dodgers won't be dealing Gary Sheffield. ... A Yankees "Murderer's Woo" of Joe Torre, Roger Clemens, Yogi Berra and even New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani called to court Jason Giambi. ... Go figure. Seattle is interested in signing Roger Cedeno so the Mariners can drop AL rookie of the year and MVP Ichiro Suzuki from first to third in the batting order.

This 'n' that

New Brighton's Terry Francona will be Jerry Narron's bench coach in Texas next season. ... Kevin Orie (Upper St. Clair) signed a minor-league deal with the Cubs. ... Not that it likely matters now, but the Pirates would not have had the first pick in a dispersal draft of players from contracted teams. According to a report that surfaced in the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel (home paper of the commissioner), the draft would have been based on teams' cumulative records over the past three seasons, with this year's record counting for 50 percent, 2000 for 30 percent and 1999 for 20 percent. The Pirates would have picked third behind Baltimore and Kansas City.

Shot and a jeer

Shot: Enron Energy filed for bankruptcy last month. No surprise to pitchers, who have been saying its namesake ballpark has been bankrupt of integrity since it opened two years ago.

Jeer: It doesn't look good for Bud Selig's claim of poverty when George Mitchell, former U.S. Senate majority leader and chair of the Commissioner's Blue Ribbon Panel report that decries the game's sorry economic state, is looking to buy into the game as part of a group bidding on the Red Sox.