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Sunday, May 06, 2001

Hits are down. Runs are down. Home runs are down. The only thing farther down the Checklist of Down this Sunday morning are tree-huggers' impressions of George W.'s first 100 days and critics' reviews of "Joe Dirt."

But don't blame the Milwaukee Brewers. Going into last night's game in Florida, they were ahead of last year's pace in every offensive category. Particularly home runs. Fans love home runs.

Which means Geoff Jenkins' assault on Montreal pitching last weekend had to be akin to an open house at the Playboy mansion. In wins over the Expos Saturday and Sunday, Jenkins was 7 for 9 with 5 homers, 12 RBIs and 6 runs scored and in the process turned attention to a Brewers team that is a surprising 15-13 and hitting home runs reminiscent of the heady days of Harvey's Wallbangers.

Even when Jenkins didn't really want a homer, as was the case in the sixth inning Sunday at Miller Park, he hit one.

The Brewers offer a promotion in which any player who hits for the cycle in a home game wins a Harley-Davidson. No player has ever won the motorcycle, but that record appeared in jeopardy when Jenkins got to the plate in the sixth. He had already singled, doubled and homered. All he needed was the triple. He launched a pitch off Graeme Lloyd to deep center. Expos center fielder Milton Bradley ran back on the ball.

What happened next can only happen when a player and/or team is going good. The ball caromed off Bradley's glove ... and over the wall.

Darn it! Another home run.

For visiting teams, like the Pirates who get their first look at the Brewers' new home Friday, "Darn it! Miller Park" might be more like it. While the verdict is still out on the Pirates' PNC Park home, it didn't take long for the Brewers' new home to be dubbed "Thriller" Park for its propensity to produce the long ball.

Nineteenth in the majors in homers a year ago (177), the Brewers already have 45 this season which puts them fourth.

A major-league high 30 have come at home, where the power alleys are shorter and cold, April winds blowing in on cold bats and colder hands are forbidden by the park's 21st century roof. The number includes Jenkins' record-tying five in two games. To offer a little perspective, until this week the Orioles hadn't hit more than five as a team in any week this season.

Jenkins, who had a unconscious 21-for-31 hot spell at the plate stopped by a trip to the disabled list Friday, has nine homers, Jeromy Burnitz eight and Jose Hernandez seven. They are on a pace for 260, which would obliterate from the club record book the 216 hit by Cecil Cooper, Gorman Thomas, Robin Yount and the rest of Harvey's Wallbangers in 1982.

"I've already hit a couple balls here that I guarantee would not have gone out at County Stadium," says Burnitz, who has hit 30-plus each of the past three seasons.

The new park? Remember Bernie Brewer, the club mascot that slides down a chute out beyond center field into an industrial strength, beer-lover's mug of suds after every home run? San Francisco first baseman J.T. Snow gave Bernie's new Miller Park ride a test run when the Giants visited last month.

"It seems like he'll be sliding down a lot this year," Snow told Henry Schulman of the San Francisco Chronicle. "He'll have to get a new suit by the end of the year."

Or a 30-day rehab stay at the Betty Ford.

Game preparation

Not to take the matter lightly, but Twins officials took inventory of the items thrown in the direction of Yankees left fielder Chuck Knoblauch during New York's visit to the Minneapolis this week. On Tuesday night -- the night before play was halted for 12 minutes by umpires to ensure Knoblauch's safety -- the Twins collected two cigarette lighters, 77 cents, one Peppermint Patty and a kazoo.

Now that's something no true fan can enjoy a game without.

Hey Marge, we got everything? Tickets. Check. Kids. Check. Cash. Check. Whoops! Almost forgot the kazoo.

Series of the week

Twins (20-7) at Yankees (18-13), Tuesday-Thursday. ... Twins fans have been gone so long, they're neophytes when it comes to giving a player a bad time. Yankees Manager Joe Torre says he doesn't expect retaliation for the abuse Chuck Knoblauch endured, but says Minnesota's Torii Hunter: "[Our fans] started a war. I think I'll wear a hard hat."

Jose, we can see

We can all rest easy. Jose Canseco, released by the Angels in spring training, has found work. The owner of 446 career home runs was in the lineup when the Newark (N.J.) Bears of the independent Atlantic League opened their season Friday against the Nashua (N.H.) Pride. The Bears sport a definite major-league old-folks home quality. Also on the roster are Jose's brother, Ozzie, Jim Leyritz, Lance Johnson, Jaime Navarro and Jack Armstrong, which, for the record, would probably give them enough oomph! to nose out Tampa Bay and Baltimore for fourth place in the AL East.

Canseco, 37, had a single and double in four at-bats in a 10-3 Bears loss. But it's not so much the wins or losses for him as proving to major-league general managers that reports of a broken-down Jose that trickled out of the Anaheim camp this spring were greatly exaggerated if not fabricated. In fact, take note: Canseco told reporters Friday that if he stays healthy "I have at least 150-200 more homers in me." Wow!

FYI: Canseco will earn $3,000 a month -- the league maximum -- or about one-third of what he made per at-bat with Tampa Bay and New York last year.

Curse of the fungo

Dodgers bench coach Jim Riggleman has been in the game for 27 years. The Guy would think he'd know the basics by now. When bat meets face, face loses. "I totally spaced out," says Riggleman. As such, there might be a bit more space between Riggleman's eyes these days. During pregame drills April 26, Riggleman walked into the fungo bat of fellow Dodgers coach Glenn Hoffman. Unfortunately for Riggleman, Hoffman was swinging said fungo at the time. "It's not like I didn't know Glenn was there; but a ball was thrown in, I reached over to get it and just totally forgot that he was there," Riggleman said. Box score line: One black eye (right), one broken nose, one red face.

It's a gift

After Reds prodigal son Deion Sanders went 3 for 3 with a home run, a stolen base, three RBIs and one very emotional curtain call in his first major-league game in 1,364 days Tuesday night, Reds Manager Bob Boone told reporters: "God gave Deion something he left off my plate."

Likewise, the following makes The Guy wonder about the quality of Chinette he was holding when The Manager dished out powers of observation. A reader of ESPN.com's Jayson Stark points out that last Saturday, the day "61*" premiered on HBO, Yankees rookie starting pitcher Ted Lilly wore No. 61 to the Yankee Stadium mound in recording his first career victory. What's more, the first hit he gave up was to a hitter wearing No. 9 -- Roger Maris' number.

This 'n' that

The Twins, Cubs, Brewers and Phillies are all enjoying a renaissance, but what about Phillies pitcher Omar Daal? He was 4-19 a year ago with a 6.14 ERA and needed a "knee injury" to hold him out of his final start of the season and the chance to become the first 20-game loser since 1981. Today, Daal (3.13 ERA) can go to 4-0 with a win against the Giants at The Vet. ... Another pitching assignment worth noting today: Mike Mussina (2-3, 3.73 ERA) makes his first start at Camden Yards in Yankee pinstripes. ... All-Star ballots will be available in foreign ports of call like Japan, Mexico and Venezuela this year. "Just don't send any to Florida," writes Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle.

Shot and a jeer

Shot: To Rangers owner Tom Hicks. Yeah, A-Rod's doing well (.311, 9 HRs, 23 RBIs) for that $252 million. But with a team ERA of 6.56, now might be the time to bring up that clause in his contract about him having to pitch.

Jeer: The Orioles finished April with 14 home runs, or just one more than Luis Gonzalez. Baltimore fan mag "Outside Pitch" ran a Top 10 list explaining the reasons for the Birds' dearth of power. No. 7 on the list: Angling for HBO movie "16*".

Box score lines of the week:

When a four-time Cy Young winner sets a career high (14 strikeouts), he automatically goes to the head of the list.

Generally, there are no upsides to a line such as this. Except in this instance, where Petkovsek's otherwise failed outing lowered his ERA at Cleveland's Jacobs Field from 202.50 to 76.50. Considering the Rangers' plight on the mound, it might just rate him a start.

Ended the night with a great empathy for Chuck Knoblauch.