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Monday, October 28, 2002

Bobbleheads, beer and a big-screen television. No, Steelers viewing doesn't get any better than this. Except when the big-screen TV is the world's biggest screen: the south end zone scoreboard at Heinz Field.

So a few thousand folks from as far away as Meadville and Poland -- Ohio, that is -- found their own reasons to traipse inside The Mustard Bowl yesterday. A few hundred came only for the Jerome Bettis bobbleheads, which looked remarkably like a stocky Will Smith. Another thousand came for the Ed Rendell gubernatorial rally afterward, making this a wacked doubleheader -- Steelers-Ravens, Democrats-Republicans (Mike Fisher made the rounds pressing flesh, or gloves, during the first half).

And some of us enjoyed simply watching two tractors and a gaggle of grounds-crew guys reduce the natural playing surface to one big pile of soil for resodding.

Who says only journalists like to dig up dirt?

The Steelers throw these Road Warrior parties every Sunday their team isn't home. They swing open the doors at 11:30 a.m., charge $7 a ticket, hand the first 1,000 through Gate A a special-edition bobblehead, offer concessions and a band and alumni autographs and the Steelers Experience games for kids and the perspective of a humongous living-room TV. With three noticeable differences.

Your living room is never this c-c-c-cold.

Your kids would never be allowed to play in so much dirt before your very eyes.

You're going to have a hard time convincing Andy Russell and Jon Kolb to attend an autograph party at your house.

First, and seemingly most important to modern-day sports consumers, let's discuss the allure of the bobblehead. There were people who walked in, got their rectangular white box, and walked out. Smiling, even. Maybe they were jiggy with the Will Smith likeness.

It'll be interesting to see the turnout next week, when the Steelers travel to Cleveland and the Road Warrior promotion is ... the Kordell Stewart bobblehead. No, wiseacre, it isn't a bobblearm, either.

The big screen was tuned to the CBS pregame show while patrons made their way to the seats in the lower east-side stands. There were people in Steelers helmets, caps, jerseys, sweatshirts, whatever. They carried to their seats cups of beer or soft drinks, lunchtime orders of popcorn or nachos or pretzels or hot dogs or pizza or sandwiches. Dozens even tailgated first -- as if they needed a reason for that.

In other words, it was pretty similar to a home game day.

At kickoff, the public-address system switched to the Steelers Radio Network broadcast with Bill Hillgrove, Myron Cope and Tunch Ilkin. So this was the ultimate testament to that old "turn down the sound and turn up your radio" promotion. As on a normal Steelers home game day, the crowd was late to arrive, with several fans even missing the Amos Zereoue touchdown on the fifth play from scrimmage. And when he scored, there was as raucous a celebration as if it played out before them: the faithful waving Terrible Towels, screaming, clapping, high-fiving one another, jumping up and down.

Of course, Zereoue wouldn't have gotten very far in the new expanse of infield dirt between the end zones, getting prepped for resodding.

Yesterday's viewing, and likely the subsequent ones in November and December, presented a problem with staying warm. The temperature hovered around an acceptable 50 degrees, but with the cloudy ceiling and the 10-mph winds, it got rather chilly in your outdoor living room on the North Shore. No wonder so many of us left at halftime.

With bobbleheads under arm, of course.

Remote notes

Radio line of the day belonged to the Post-Gazette's Gerry Dulac on the Steelers Radio Network. Discussing Craig Wolfley's correct prediction on the Steelers-Colts score Monday (28-10), he said: "As Bill Cowher might put it, 'You're quite aprocrastinator.' "

HBO's "Real Sports" report on a gay former NFL player airs tomorrow at 10 p.m. While watching it, keep in mind that Esera Tuaolo -- like Dave Kopay before him -- is speaking for the many homosexuals who follow them in silence while playing the game.