Q. My son thinks he's a superhero. What should I do to help him understand the difference between reality and fantasy?

A. Most kids go through a superhero phase. They're small and the world is big. Acting like a superhero is a way to feel powerful and in control.

We think it's a generally harmless and often fun way to play, and most children soon come to understand the difference between reality and fantasy. But it's always a good idea for parents, teachers and other adults to gently reinforce that--for instance, by prefacing fantasy play with "Let's pretend..." or "Let's make believe..." and, when it's over, saying things like "Pretending was fun, wasn't it?"

The only caution we have about your little superhero is that you keep an eye on tendencies toward violent play, which is sometimes part of superheroism. You know: Bam! Pow!

Meanwhile, you might try guiding your son's play.

You can ask him why he likes a particular superhero. What aspects does he value? You may be able to help him develop some of those attributes in himself -- for example, helping people who need it.

You can help him act out what happens when his favorite superhero goes to the grocery store, or think about what the superhero eats for breakfast.

Try the "would you rather..." game. Would your son rather fly like Superman or climb like Spiderman? Ask him why he prefers one or the other.

Sometimes you can even become "SuperMom," along the way modeling and facilitating appropriate superhero play. It can include reality-based safety lessons, stressing that it's only "pretend" to do things like stand in front of trains or jump off buildings, and real people do not do that, ever.

Another possible activity: Gather crayons and paper and help your son create his own series of superhero stories -- starring himself.