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Cat's Call
Pittsburgh Post-Gazette
34 Blvd. of the Allies
Pittsburgh, Pa. 15222

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DEAR CAT: I met an amazing girl, and we talked on the phone every day for a week before our first date. The date was so good that, halfway through, we were making plans for the week. When she went to the restroom I got a text from a girl I dated a few weeks before. I responded, saying I was busy and would call her later. I signed it "xo" because that's what she did. (It didn't mean anything romantic, I was just being nice.) Once I hit send I realized I had sent it to the girl I was on the date with! She came back and said, "Did you just text me?" The excuse I came up with was terrible. We stayed for another hour, but it was awkward. The next day I called her to come clean and apologize. We had a good conversation, and I know there is a major spark. I haven't met someone like this in a very long time. She said she needs to "take a breather." How do I make this better? -- STUPID, STUPID MOVE

DEAR STUPID: This story doesn't click -- all you had to do was hit "reply" to the text. You wanted your date to "mistakenly" get it so she'd feel jealous that you're so in-demand. It's fine to date a few people at the same time, but if you're unable do it without treating your dates like disposable tissue, please stop. Your only hope is to tell her that you honestly think she's incredible and you want to spend more time together. Tell her she can watch you delete every woman's name from your phone so you can devote your attention only to her, at least for a few weeks to see how things go. If she doesn't bite ...

Cat's Call: Let it go, and promise me you'll never be this stupid again.

DEAR CAT: I subscribe to a few online dating sites, and so far I've met a few nice women, one or two with potential. I got an e-mail from a coworker who saw me on one of the sites. She said that even though she doesn't subscribe to the site, she browses there every few weeks and recognized me from a company party. She basically asked me out, and I don't even know her. Moreover, I feel somewhat "found out" and angry that she e-mailed me during the work day for personal reasons. Let me say again: I don't even know her! I want to tell her off, but since we're technically coworkers, how can I decline? Didn't she cross a line here? -- "OUTED" AT WORK

DEAR OUTED: Oh, yeah, she crossed a line. She browsed a dating site where people pay to communicate with each other, then she surprised (i.e. ambushed) you at work. This has happened to many people (myself included) and it's the main reason dating sites should protect members' privacy from nonsubscribers. Your best bet is to tell her you're dating someone, but also suggest that she join the site because she's so interested in the people on it. If she's too lazy, or unwilling to invest the money ...

Cat's Call: She doesn't deserve to sample the merchandise.