
Financial guru and founder of The Children's Financial Network, Neale Godfrey was in Pittsburgh earlier this year for a free talk, "Tools to Help Your Family in These Tough Economic Times," presented by Jewish Family and Children's Service. The network has a program sponsored by Deloitte Foundation called "Life Inc., The Ultimate Career Guide for Young People." Jewish Family and Children's Services will be offering it to schools in Pittsburgh for free.
How did money become such a big secret, especially in families?
Our generation was raised on the Donna Reed [prototype] and Donna Reed was the quintessential American housewife during the '50s, '60s and '70s. During that period polite people didn't talk about money. We didn't have the skills to talk to our children about it.
Was the intention to protect children from worry?
Part of it was worry -- let kids be kids. We really didn't talk to them about anything. We didn't talk to them about sickness or marital problems. We did not have the access to information in those days either. Kids were not instantaneously clued in like they are today. The other thing is, it was a simpler time. We were a consuming nation, but when I grew up, we had five candy bars and two kinds of sneakers. Now there are infinite possibilities. We didn't have access to credit. If you didn't have the money -- you didn't buy it. So within one generation the rules all changed.
What was in your own experience as a child that pushed you into the financial world?
Women didn't go into money. I went into the financial world and was one of the first female executives at Chase Manhattan Bank when it decided to train and hire a few women to become executives, literally. This was in 1972. That was a huge change. I left Chase after 13 years and became president of the First Women's Bank and at that point in 1985, I had two small children. I watched them say I want, I want. I also watched women be disempowered handling money. I just knew this had to become my life's work to empower. So I created the topic of kids and money in the mid '80s. I opened the first Children's Bank at FAO Schwartz in 1988. And an institute for Youth Entrepreneurship up in Harlem to give at-risk kids the ability to be brought into the economy, to get excited and have choices in their life. Then I left the bank and formed my own company The Children's Financial Network in 1989. So 20 years later it is an accepted topic. But we are still disempowered.
Do you think children today, who are caught up in this economy -- parent lost a job or having to move because of a foreclosure -- will actually be better for it?
Absolutely, what happens is we will teach our children. We know they have to learn the stuff, and we learn along the way.
Is the basic idea of saving really enough?
I teach earning, saving, spending and sharing. I have 16 books, a New York Times best-seller and I've been on Oprah 13 times.
People do feel shame when they can't manage their financial situations and perhaps children feel it in school.
What you have to do is be empowered to take a deep breath and frankly this economic market has allowed us what I call a "do over." We are not our stuff. We are not our iPods, designer coffee and fancy cars. That is stuff. This is a time to really sit down and access what are our family values? What do you want to convey to these kids? Come clean with them. Really sit down and say, "This is who we are as a family. We give to charity we ..." Fill in the blank. There are only two things you can do with money. You can earn more or spend less. It's a little hard in this market to earn more.
What about investing?
It's important to keep investing. Do not freeze up and stop. I'm not going to make any investment recommendations. It may be you are putting it in a CD, that's OK, too.
A lot more adult children are living at home because of their own school loans, not finding a job or low-paying jobs.
I don't have the current statistics, but a few years ago it was 40 percent of the kids return to the empty nest because of socioeconomic levels. They would rather live at hotel mom and dad. But there is no shame in receiving. We as a society have to get to that point of not feeling shame in having to ask for help, especially in these economic times.
Is it a good idea for parents who have grown children living at home to charge rent?
Yes, you have to get them on a budget. Sit down with them and say what are your goals long term. I think you should write out a contract so that everything is spelled out specifically. Maybe chores instead of rent. What are the privileges? Be really specific. The breakdown is going to occur over misunderstandings.
Money has this sort of magical, powerful component to it -- more will make me happy, less causes worry. For many there is never enough.
It is not what you earn. It is what you spend, save and share that makes a difference. You all need a budget. Regardless of the amount, you could spend infinitely. The message is, it is what you do with it, not what you make. We have not learned to live within our means. By the way, when I grew up, we weren't bored. It's time for all of us to work together and there is no shame in asking for help.
Mackenzie Carpenter's video program, "Omnivore," is available exclusively at PG+, a members-only web site of the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. Our introduction to PG+ gives you all the details.