TechMan is not much for crusades. (If you don't count that little jaunt with his buddy Dick the Lionhearted a few years ago.)

But he feels the need to get on his high horse (whatever that means) about the antiquated state of the computer keyboard.

Every part of your desktop computer has been modernized except the keyboard.

Oh, yes, there are specialized keyboards and wireless keyboards and light-up keyboards, but the keys and their arrangement on a PC keyboard have not changed since the early 1980s.

In 1984, IBM introduced the doomed PC Jr. It lasted only a year, in large part because it had a terrible keyboard. But in the same year IBM introduced the 101-key "M" keyboard, still in use and considered by many the best keyboard ever made. Since then the only changes to the keys has been adding two Windows keys and a menu key on Windows keyboards. So TechMan is on a crusade to invade the keyboard and kill useless keys.

We have talked before about the three keys at the upper right. Pause/Break was used to pause or stop programs in the DOS programming language. DOS is history, and so should this key be.

Scroll Lock locked the screen in early programs so that new text did not scroll off the top. Who cares these days? Deep six it.

Part of the Print Screen/SysRq key actually is useful. Print Screen originally did what it says, send a snapshot of the screen to the printer. Now it usually sends a snapshot of the screen to the clipboard. I think the key should have both functions.

To make room, we get rid of the SysRq function. It is exquisitely useless and can be traced back to the operator interrupt key on IBM mainframe computers. Using one of those at home these days?

Let's take a look at the numpad, the grouping of 17 keys to the right of the keyboard. When the Num Lock key is engaged, these act as an adding machine keyboard. No problem.

But when the Num Lock key is not engaged, their function is exactly the same as the group of six keys to the left. Why? Either get rid of the Num Lock or use it to enable some useful functions such as "back" in the browser or "select all" or "copy" or "paste."

Now for the most irritating key on the keyboard -- the Caps Lock key. If you engage it by mistake, YOU START TYPING LIKE THIS. TechMan hates when that happens.

Not only is it not needed, it is in a heavy traffic spot on the keyboard. Get rid of it, the Shift key is fine.

Another annoying key is the Insert key. If it is on, when you type, new characters are inserted into the text and all is well. The problem is that it is a toggle. If it is on and you depress it by mistake, in some programs (such as Outlook, for example) you are now in overstrike mode so that each letter you type deletes a letter already there. Maddening. This key should be executed.

Speaking of execute, let's look at the Enter key, which is often used to execute screen choices. Enter is one of the most commonly used keys, but you'll notice it is often smaller than the Shift key, which on my keyboard is honkin' huge. Also, there is only one Enter, whereas there are two of many other keys, such as Shift.

I say make Enter bigger and add another one where that pesky Caps Lock key used to be.

Look at the key right under the Backspace key. In the shift position, it types a horizontal line (|) called a pipe, purely a programmer's mark. In fact, many of these useless keys were included for early programmers. They're gone and so should their keys be.

On that same key is backslash (\), also called the reverse solidus. Since we now have space on that key, TechMan proposes moving the forward slash (/), also called the solidus, virgule or (my favorite) the whack, to that key.

Another useless programmer's key is the ^ or caret (also called the circumflex or top hat) in the shift position of the 6 key. Although it can also indicate the square, cube or other power of a number, there are other ways to do that. Subtract it.

So come on computer makers, move the keyboard into the 21st century. Delete all those useless keys.