Don't know about you, but I sorta freak out when something I'm grilling catches fire and dinner, quite literally, goes up in a plume of black smoke. But my husband? No barbecue flame is ever too big, too hot or too scary for him to manage.

Call it a guy thing. Since the first prehistoric man discovered that wooly mammoth tasted a heck of a lot better roasted than bloody and raw, men have been cooking over fire ... and loving every sizzling, potentially dangerous minute of it.

"It's primal," my husband, a grillmeister if there ever was one, tells me. "We see a fire and get the urge to throw something big and juicy on it."

And if that "something" accidentally ignites? That's why they invented squirt bottles, 18-inch tongs and insulated oven mitts, dummy!

Yet there's another reason modern fathers and sons enjoy cooking over an open flame, and they do it so much more often than the girls in their lives (males not only make the decision to cook out 52 percent of the time but also account for 59 percent of all grillers, according to the Hearth, Patio & Barbecue Association). Cooking out doesn't come with the same pressures, or scrutiny, of regular cooking.

In the kitchen, notes Bob Sloan, author of the new "Dad's Awesome Grilling Book" (Chronicle, $22.95), it always feels as though something could go wrong. The pace is a bit more frenetic, there's more margin for error and the end product (even if it's delicious) is naturally compared with Mom's version. "No matter how hard I try, whatever I make is either 'not as good as Mom's' or 'just as good as Mom's,' " he writes. "Either way, I'm deep in her gastronomic shadow."

But the grill? That's a man's special domain, his oasis from the vicissitudes of being a dad, says Mr. Sloan.

Other than the lid and the burner knobs, there's not a whole lot of moving parts on a grill, he says, so men feel more in control -- of the heat, of the food, of their culinary abilities. They appreciate the simplicity of grill cooking. "Ultimately, it's Step A and then Step A again," Mr. Sloan says in a phone interview from his apartment in New York's Upper East Side, where he pens detective novels when he's not writing about food.

Men also get to be outside while grilling.

With that in mind, it's completely understandable why dads all across the country will be firing up the grill this weekend in celebration of Father's Day. And why Mom will be hovering happily in the background.

His day, his say, his way.

"What's the joke . . . where there's smoke, there's father?" quips Mr. Sloan.

Most likely, legions of sons (Mr. Sloan's progeny included) also will be watching and learning, so when the times comes for the ceremonial passing of the tongs, they'll be ready.

Not that that's a problem, as grilling has come a long way from its humble roots in the past few years. When Mr. Sloan was a kid, for instance, homemade sauces still were fairly unheard of, and the Asian section at the grocery store consisted of soy sauce, water chestnuts and baby corn. So the Chinese-style, sweet-and-sour steaks his father cooked were -- well, he can't really say if they were good or not. "But it was fun and he was deft on the grill."

Today? More dads than ever are trying their hand at new techniques -- plank grilling and smoking are increasingly popular -- and they're stretching beyond the traditional burgers, steaks and brats. That's part of the reason Mr. Sloan, who worked as a caterer for many years in Manhattan, cooked up this sixth cookbook: to encourage them to further expand their repertoire with some easy yet incredibly tasty recipes, all written in a language that Dad can understand (with honesty, brevity and humor).

Consider his recipe for barbecued leg of lamb, which marries the smoky heat of chipotle chilies with garlic, tomatillo and cinnamon. Many guys might say, "What's butterflied mean?" or better yet, "What's a leg of lamb?" Yet show 'em how that particular piece of meat is no different from a cut of beef, he says, and the mystery is gone. (In case you're wondering, 'butterflied' means to cut open and spread flat.)

"In a way, it's like a giant hamburger. You're cooking it the same way," says Mr. Sloan, who judges recipes by what one can get in a remote corner of northern Michigan, where he has a summer home.

Cooking classes geared toward charcoal and gas grilling are helping this latest crop of outdoor cooks sharpen their culinary skills. Nick Nicholas, co-owner of Nicholas Coffee in Market Square, Downtown, was among the large group that attended the "Grillin' & Swillin' " class taught last month by Chef Jason Capps at Bella Sera by Greco in Canonsburg. Proving the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree, accompanying him was the youngest of two sons, Jordan, 24.

Mr. Nicholas says the pair took the class as a way to "brush up" for the family cookouts he and his wife, Sandy, host every Sunday during the summer at their Upper St. Clair home. And indeed, both men learned something new: that with the right marinade and when properly sliced, even a less expensive cut of meat (in this case, flank steak) can make for a tasty dish.

A year-round griller, Mr. Nicholas says he learned the art of grilling by watching his own father cook steaks and burgers. Today, he enjoys almost anything cooked on his built-in Dacor gas grill, including vegetables, shrimp and fresh fish. Having Jordan also attend the class, he says, will help continue that tradition.

"I want the boys to learn so that when they're older and get married, they'll be able to contribute instead of letting their wives do everything," he says.

Mr. Sloan would love to see all you grill-happy dads venture beyond burgers and brats this Father's Day. But he understands completely if you stick with a classic. He will be charcoal-grilling one of his favorites: marinated skirt steak tacos.

Um, shouldn't his wife or kids be doing the cooking? Maybe.

Mr. Sloan has so much fun in front of the grill that he considers it a treat.

As he puts it, "It's festive."

Steak Tacos

PG tested

These may be basic, but they're also delicious.

• 1 1/2 pounds skirt steak
• 2 tablespoons chili powder
• 2 tablespoons garlic powder
• Salt and freshly ground pepper
• 12 corn tortillas
• 12-ounce jar salsa
• 4 ounces Monterey jack cheese, grated
• 3 limes, quartered into wedges

Season both sides of the steaks with chili and garlic powder and salt and pepper to taste. Set aside while you light the grill.

Wrap the tortillas in aluminum foil in 3 packages of 4 tortillas each and set aside. Preheat oven to 225 degrees.

Prepare enough coals for a hot charcoal fire, or preheat gas grill on high for 10 minutes with lid closed. Put the tortilla packages in the warm oven.

When coals are ready or gas grill is hot, grill the skirt steaks for 4 minutes, until they are nicely browned. Turn and grill for 4 to 5 minutes more, until they are medium.

Transfer steaks to a cutting board and cut them into 3/4-inch-thick slices. Transfer sliced meat to a platter and set it on a serving table with warm tortillas, salsa, grated cheese and lime wedges. Let everyone assemble their own tacos.

Serves 4

-- "Dad's Awesome Grilling Book" by Bob Sloan (Chronicle, 2009, $24.95)

Stir-Grilled Coconut Shrimp

PG tested

Stir-frying on the grill is easier than you might think. You just have to remember to drain the excess marinade before you place the wok on the grates.

• 2 green onions, thinly sliced on the diagonal
• 1 1/2 cups coconut milk
• 1 tablespoon finely minced jalapeno pepper
• 1 tablespoon finely minced serrano pepper
• Grated zest and juice of 1 lime
• 1 pound large shrimp, peeled and deveined
• 1/2 cup unsweetened shredded coconut
• 1 cup black or jasmine rice, cooked

• Special equipment

  12-inch metal grill wok or basket with perforations

Prepare marinade by whisking together green onions, coconut milk, jalapeno, serrano, lime zest and lime juice.

Rinse shrimp under cold running water and pat dry. Place shrimp in a large sealable plastic bag and pour in 3/4 of the marinade. Seal, toss to coat and refrigerate for at least 30 minutes or up to 8 hours, tossing occasionally. Cover and refrigerate the remaining marinade until ready to use. Meanwhile, prepare a medium-hot fire in your grill.

Place grill wok over the kitchen sink and pour in shrimp mixture, draining the marinade. Sprinkle shrimp with coconut. Set wok on baking sheet and carry out to grill.

Place wok on grill. Grill, tossing with long-handled wooden spatulas every 3 to 4 minutes, for 12 to 15 minutes, or until shrimp are pink and opaque.

Toss rice with the reserved marinade and serve with the shrimp.

Serves 8 as an appetizer or 2 to 3 as an entree.

-- "300 Big & Bold Barbecue & Grilling Recipes" by Karen Adler and Judith Fertig (Robert Rose, 2009, $24.95)

Honey-Glazed Spareribs

PG tested

These sticky-sweet ribs are precooked, so they only require a short time on the grill. Be sure to use tongs instead of a fork to turn them or you'll release the precious juices from the meat.

• 1/2 cup white wine
• 1/2 cup soy sauce
• 1 bunch scallions, green parts only, finely chopped
• 3 tablespoons finely chopped fresh ginger
• 8 cloves garlic, coarsely chopped
• 6 tablespoons brown sugar
• 1 tablespoon Chinese five-spice powder
• Pinch ground cayenne pepper
• 3 to 4 pounds spareribs (about 2 slabs) cut into individual ribs
• Honey Glaze (recipe below)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

In a large bowl, combine the wine, soy sauce, scallions, ginger, garlic, brown sugar, five-spice powder and cayenne.

Place the ribs in the bowl with the wine mixture, tossing them gently so they are all coated evenly. Transfer the ribs and liquid to a baking pan, cover with foil and bake in the center of oven for 1 hour. Let ribs cool, then transfer them to a plastic container and refrigerate for up to 2 days.

To finish ribs on the grill, prepare enough coals for a medium-hot charcoal fire, or preheat gas grill on medium-high for 10 minutes with the lid closed.

When coals are ready or gas grill is hot, grill the ribs until heated through, about 15 minutes, turning and mopping them several times with the Honey Glaze so they are nicely coated. Serve immediately with a lot of napkins.

Serves 4.

-- "Dad's Awesome Grilling Book" by Bob Sloan (Chronicle, 2009, $24.95)

Honey Glaze

PG tested

• 2/3 cup honey
• 1/2 cup fresh orange juice
• 1/4 cup fresh lemon juice
• 3 tablespoons soy sauce
• 2 tablespoons Dijon-style mustard
• 1 tablespoon sesame oil
• 1 teaspoon curry powder
• 1 teaspoon ground ginger

In a medium bowl, stir together all ingredients. Set aside until ready to use, or refrigerate, covered, for up to 1 week. Let the glaze come to room temperature before using.

Makes about 2 cups.

-- "Dad's Awesome Grilling Book" by Bob Sloan (Chronicle, 2009, $24.95)

Amber Cayenne-Citrus Marinade

Dad probably loves to drink it, so why not use beer in your cooking, too? This easy marinade can be used on beef or lamb.

• 2 12-ounce bottles amber ale
• 1 tablespoon red wine vinegar
• 2 tablespoons fresh orange juice
• 1 teaspoon grated orange zest
• 1/2 cup canola oil
• 1 tablespoon grated horseradish
• 1/2 cup minced onion
• 2 tablespoons minced garlic
• 2 teaspoons salt
• 1 teaspoon cayenne pepper (or more, to taste)

Mix all ingredients together in a blender, pureeing until onions and garlic are liquefied. Reserve 1 cup for basting, and use remainder as a marinade for beef or lamb (shoulder or leg cut). Marinate meat for at least 2 hours for best flavor.

Makes about 2 cups of marinade.

-- Grillingwithbeer.com