The big news this past week -- besides the possible crack-up of Jon & Kate Gosselin's marriage -- was the announcement that the next G-20 Summit of world leaders will convene in Pittsburgh on Sept. 24 and 25.
Not to belittle my hometown -- we've certainly earned the honor of hosting such an event, if only by rising so far above 100 years of bad PR -- but this is not the sort of thing we generally see at the confluence of the three rivers.
Penguins chasing the Stanley Cup, yes.
Steelers-related tailgate parties and street-choking Superbowl celebrations, sure.
St. Patrick's and Labor Day parades, absolutely.
Arts festivals in a monsoon, annually.
Marathon races through the neighborhoods lined with local throngs urging the runners on, by all means.
But international confabs featuring the top officials of 20 nations representing 85 percent of the world's economy, not so much.
Which is probably why, when presidential press secretary Robert Gibbs announced the plan at a press briefing, he was greeted by murmurs of "What?" "Where?" and "Why?"
Well, it's about time someone at the top of the food chain noticed all the great transformations taking place around here and decided to show them off to many important dignitaries from around the world.
According to a White House press release, President Barack Obama invited these leaders to meet with him at the David L. Lawrence Convention Center to discuss building a "sound and sustainable recovery from the global economic and financial crisis."
Pittsburgh, the statement said, "has demonstrated a commitment to employing new and green technology to further economic recovery and development," and cited the convention center as an example (it's the largest LEED-certified convention center in the world).
Mr. Gibbs said the location was also chosen because of Pittsburgh's recovery from the decline of the steel industry in the 1980s.
All true, of course. But it didn't hurt that Mr. Obama has close relationships with Pennsylvania Sen. Bob Casey and Steelers owner Dan Rooney, also his nominee for U.S. ambassador to Ireland. Also not hurting were Mr. Obama's popularity in Western Pennsylvania, his fondness for Pamela's pancakes and his contacts with Democratic leaders Mayor Luke Ravenstahl and Allegheny County Executive Dan Onorato.
How big a boost could this be to Pittsburgh's image and tourist industry? Well, the G-20 includes Argentina, Australia, Brazil, Canada, China, France, Germany, India, Indonesia, Italy, Japan, Mexico, Russia, Saudi Arabia, South Africa, South Korea, Turkey, the United Kingdom, the United States and the European Union (which brings along the European Central Bank).
Each leader will come with a sizable entourage. Then there will be the anarchists and other protesters who will come to make known their displeasure with the distribution of power in the world, as they have at other global economic summits. Then there's the international press corps, whose members, if they're expecting the gritty city of 50 years ago, will be surprised by what they find.
All of these people will need housed and fed, as we say in Pittsburghese, which will be a boon to the local economy. All of them will need protected, the cost of which I don't even want to think about. And all of them will need shown around and introduced to our many charms.
How to do all the fun stuff in two days when most of their time will be spent on official business surrounded by layers of security? After they take in that first amazing burst of the city panorama upon exiting the Fort Pitt Tunnels, how to make sure they get to savor the local color that really makes this town what it is?
My suggestion is to minimize the talk and maximize the touring.
We're not going to see Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi or China President Hu Jintao body surfing across the Boulevard of the Allies a la Troy Polamalu, but that doesn't mean they can't enjoy their visit here.
My one disappointment is that Venezuela is not part of the G-20. President Hugo Chavez, at a meeting of Latin American leaders last month, gave Mr. Obama a copy of "Open Veins of Latin America: Five Centuries of the Pillage of a Continent," by Uruguayan writer Eduardo Galeano. I was hoping for a return of the favor -- perhaps a copy of "The Mysteries of Pittsburgh" by Pitt graduate Michael Chabon. But I guess that will have to wait for another summit.