A pearl of wisdom:This headline caught our attention: Fragrant foul: Malodorous mascots in March madness. Got you hooked, right? Well, the story that followed from our good friends at The Associated Press included this: Current Tennessee basketball coach Bruce Pearl was an administrative assistant at Boston College in 1981, when the Eagles made the NCAA tournament. The mascot got sick, so Pearl was ordered to put on the beak. He did everything he could to distract Ball State's players. "They were going to throw me out. I broke like five NCAA rules," Pearl joked. C'mon, Bruce, you know you've got to break more than five to be suspended by the NC ... oh, never mind.

Pass the parmesan: Former major league manager Mike Hargrove responding to a Washington sportscaster's question about his qualifications for being Italy's bench coach in the World Baseball Classic. "I know how to spell lasagna." We'd call that a tasty morsel.