Losing your job can be like losing someone you love.

There are stages of grieving, which is why Lita Epstein, the author of "Surviving a Layoff: A Week-By-Week Guide to Getting Your Life Back Together" said if you lose your job, you shouldn't start job hunting right away. Not that it's unseemly, in the way that bringing a date to your spouse's funeral would be, but like any rebound relationship, if you land a job right away, it probably won't work out.

"When you get laid off, you really do go through the same stages of mourning as you do with a death," Ms. Epstein said.

You will need to get past the anger that will probably color any job interview you go on in the first week or two, she said.

This does not mean staying in bed with your head under the covers and drifting into a deep depression.

Instead, for one thing, you should start exercising, because exercise releases endorphins and will help you feel better about yourself.

Ms. Epstein also suggests writing a letter to your old boss, that angry letter you will never send. Instead, think of the letter as a way of working out feelings toward your former employer.

While you work through your grief, it is also important to work out your finances, so that you have an idea of the cash you have on hand, what you can expect in severance and unemployment payments and then what you need to pay the mortgage or rent and any other monthly obligations such as car loans and credit card payments.

Then cut out other expenses, and chances are you can live for at least five or six months on what you have.

"If people go into a panic about their finances, they take the first thing that comes along, so getting finances in order is so you can find the right job instead of the first job," she said.

She also suggests splitting your friends into groups, those to whom you turn for emotional support and those whom you will use for job contacts.

"If people see you in the anger phase, then later they may not want to recommend you for a job," she said.

The process of preparing for a layoff, should start before you get laid off. Ms. Epstein recommends regularly printing out copy of all of your contacts so that you have them at home and keeping copies of any special projects you completed.

Then, once laid off, you have contacts throughout your industry and the industries that serve yours.

The list of contacts is the key, Networking is still the best way to get a job, Ms. Epstein said, because 90 percent of jobs are obtained through networking and not through job sites.

The job sites, however, are great tip sheets.

By reading job descriptions and working through your network of friends, you can usually figure out who is looking for workers and perhaps someone knows someone who is doing the hiring.

"If you do the research, they may know somebody," she said.

For all job seekers, she said its important to set a looking-for-work schedule, so they get up, get dressed and get to work looking for work for at least four hours every day.

"The hardest job to do is look for a job," she said. "It's a psychological battle every day to get up and look."