The little girls and boys inside the Air Reserve hangar in Coraopolis first sat politely in front of the stage where Cookie Monster and Grover and Rosita and Elmo were singing and dancing about writing a letter to Mom or Dad, at war overseas.

But then the girl with the yellow ribbons in her long brown hair started to dance in excitement, twirling and jumping and swinging her arms to the music. And by the end of the live 25-minute performance, dozens of squealing preschoolers were crowding the stage, rock concert-like, to shake the shaggy paws of their favorite "Sesame Street" characters.

On stage, Elmo himself was singing, "I'm so proud of you," and reaching out to touch the tiny hands stretched toward him.

"Elmo and his friends thank you for helping while your mom or dad is away," he said.

For the children, yesterday's two free Muppet performances before about 1,200 service members and their families were a welcome distraction from worry about their parents' roles in fighting the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq, as well as other military operations.

For their parents, the show's message of finding positive ways to weather the long -- and in many cases, repeated -- absence of a deployed parent was a welcome lesson in coping strategies.

Wendy McKosky, a Reserve member from Oakdale who orders parts for C-130 cargo planes, said she brought her three sons -- Caleb, 4; Brandon, 9; and Craig, 14 -- to the private performance at the 911th Airlift Wing because she thought it might help them learn to manage her deployments.

She said her teenage son has a lot of trouble in school and blames her for being gone so much, while her preschooler thinks she's flying around in an airplane the entire time she's away.

"They just don't understand," Mrs. McKosky, who was deployed for the first four months of the year to Saudi Arabia, said of the boys. "Mom disappears for a couple of months and one ends up with Grandma and the other two end up with Dad. It's really hard."

The traveling show, a collaboration between "Sesame Street" and the United Service Organizations, or USO, was among 43 to be performed at military installations throughout the country between July and November. Pittsburgh was the only Reserve base to host the event, which was closed to the public.

In the show, the characters use songs and dance to help children between the ages of 2 and 5 adapt to changes and feel connected as a family when parents deploy overseas.

Writing a letter to an absent parent can help them feel closer, the characters sing. Hugging a friend can make them feel less sad. Singing songs, playing games and expressing their feelings can make them feel less lonely.

The show touches on many of the themes and suggestions contained in a DVD and booklet called "Talk, Listen, Connect" that "Sesame Street" created for military children with the help of numerous military family support groups. They are available for free from the military support group Military OneSource.

In one scene, Elmo and his mom say good night to the moon, and she reminds him that even though his dad is working far away, he is saying good night to the same moon.

"It's something they do together, to remember each other," said Josh Bourque, performance director of the show for production company VEE Corp. "Especially if they're young children, if Daddy's gone for 12 months, they might not remember what Daddy's voice sounds like."

In the booklet, parents also are given suggestions to help their children learn to express their feelings about the upheaval of departures and homecomings. They also are given ideas for adjusting to the "new normal" when a parent suffers emotional or physical injury, or simply has trouble reintegrating into home life.

During deployment, the program suggests that caretaking parents limit news of the war and help children stay connected to deployed parents through e-mail, phone calls, photos and drawings.

When deployed parents return home, children should be given time to adjust, be encouraged to share new skills with returning parents, and be prepared to expect some changes. In some cases, returning parents might have serious emotional or physical injuries that change the way they look, feel and act.

In such cases, the program suggests, children should be reassured that returning parents might look or act differently but still love them very much. And parents should encourage children to ask questions about injuries and should involve them with recovery.

Even simple ways of helping -- clapping for a first step taken by an injured parent -- can help ease fears while reconnecting with the injured parent, according to the program.

"It's giving them hope, and the tools to deal with the possibility of change," Mr. Bourque said.