Greg Behrendt doesn't think he's ever been to Pittsburgh.

"Not that I recall," he said. "Possibly did a college at some point?" Then, by way of explanation, "I used to drink."

It's that kind of nonchalant honesty, applied to his own life and others', that elevated him from stand-up comedian to relationship guru.

He's back to his stand-up roots for three nights at the Improv starting tomorrow. Of all the things he's been -- TV writer, author, talk show host -- stand-up comedian is his favorite.

Behrendt grew up in California and started in comedy there, and his material on how men and women deal (and fail to deal) with relationships led to a writing gig on "Sex and the City."

"It was fun," he said. "If you spend four years in a room full of women, you're going to learn something, unless you're an idiot."

But it's what he taught them that put him on the best-seller list.

"I've always been a pretty honest person, and when asked my opinion about a dating situation, I'd say, 'Well, I don't think that guy likes you, otherwise he'd have sex with you.' " Or at least pick up the phone. " 'The guy doesn't call you because he doesn't like you, or else he'd call you, wouldn't he? That's how he'd get a hold of you.' I don't know how to make it less complicated for you than that."

Observation and truth-telling: a comedian's stock in trade.

"I knew I was onto something, because I was ... with a group of women, all of whom were very surprised. And I was very surprised at their arguments -- 'You know, Greg, he could be really busy.' And I'd say well, that's a possibility, but I would really look at the idea that if I was really busy and I liked you, I'd still find some way to reach out to you and let you know that I wasn't avoiding you.

"But I just assumed it was the women I was working with, and I had no idea it would have the effect that it did."

That effect pushed "He's Just Not That Into You," co-authored with "Sex and the City" story editor Liz Tuccillo, to No. 1 on The New York Times best-seller list in 2004.

The simple truth that if a man wants to talk to a woman, he'll do it, made Behrendt the go-to guy for the truth about guys. Appearances followed on "Oprah," "Today," "20/20" and "Larry King" and all the late-night talk shows.

"It was never a plan of mine to become a spokesperson for men ... which I'm not. But suddenly I became one, in the national spotlight, like 'This is how men are.' Well, this is how men are according to me, according to my experiences as a man."

In 2005, Behrendt followed up with a second book, "It's Called a Break-Up Because It's Broken," written with his wife, Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt, as well as his debut comedy DVD, "Greg Behrendt Is Uncool." In 2006, he got his own eponymous talk show.

But daytime TV audiences just weren't that into him: The show lasted only a season and was canceled due to low ratings.

"I learned that you don't have to go through every door that is opened for you," Behrendt reflected. "Ultimately, I think we tried to do a good job with it. And you have to ask yourself when you pursue something, 'Is this something I'd be interested in watching?' While everyone was telling me I should do it, ... I don't like daytime television. So I found myself a little bit a fish out of water.

"As a guy who wanted to be a stand-up comedian and play music, it's weird to suddenly be anointed as somebody who has an opinion that matters. ... I'm sitting there with a bulimic and a guy who spends all his time watching porn, and I'm like, 'What am I gonna do with these two?' "

Facing middle age (he's 44) and fatherhood, Behrendt has embraced loss of cool with all the grace and attitude he can muster.

"I'm completely uncool now; I have a band." The Reigning Monarchs' MySpace page can be accessed via www.gregbehrendt.com.

"I started an instrumental punk and ska band. I don't know what could be more uncool than that. I wear a lot of argyle cardigans. I call it 'dadcore' -- you wear, like, an old dad sweater."

"He's Just Not That Into You" will be released as a movie this summer, with a cast including Scarlett Johansson, Jennifer Aniston and Ben Affleck. If you've read the book, mostly a collection of anecdotes, that may be hard to imagine.

"We wrote a script, for a man and a woman," Behrendt said. But then Drew Barrymore and her friends at Flower Films, who are producing it, "said 'We think that there's an ensemble comedy in this, and would you like to write an ensemble comedy?' And I said, 'No.' I said, 'I'm done.' I write one script, that's fine.

"They wrote another script, and it was really cute and good. And hopefully they made a good movie out of that. I didn't care -- they could make a Western out of it as far as I'm concerned.

"But I think it's gonna be great. They're very cool -- Drew and her company were great."

So what's Behrendt bringing to Pittsburgh this weekend?

"A potpourri ... from love and sex to relationships, to fame, to travel."

He's glad to be doing stand-up, even though touring takes him away from his wife and two children, ages 6 and 3.

"It's not their favorite thing," he admitted. "The hours onstage are fantastic, but it's a trade-off.

"I've been doing [comedy] for 19 years, and it's the thing I do best. If you liked me in any other medium, you'll like me even better in this one, because it's really where it all comes together for me. I don't think there's any other experience like the stand-up experience, and it really can't be had off television or video -- you have to be in a room with somebody to really get that vibe."