Who will be the next American Idol? Or more importantly, who will be the next Sanjaya? Fox's hit show is back for season seven, and the opening weeks bring us the often hilarious audition rounds in seven cities. This week, the "Idol" judges see some of 100,000 auditioners in Philadelphia and Dallas.

Angela Martin is the star of the Philly round. The 26-year-old from Chicago says it's not about the fame; the young mother wants to be able to provide for her sick daughter. The wedding singer shines with Stevie Wonder's "Signed, Sealed, Delivered." Judge Simon Cowell says all she needs to do is "de-wedding-ize" herself.

Another knockout is Kristy Lee Cook, 23, of Selma, Ore., who sold her prized horse to fly to the Philly auditions. The judges tell Kristy to up her confidence a little, but she's a shoo-in. She has Carrie Underwood-like potential.

Philly produces 29 contestants for the Hollywood round, while 24 come from Dallas. The last time "Idol" went to Dallas, season one winner, Kelly Clarkson, auditioned, but would the next success story come out of the Lone Star State?

Pia "Zpia" Easley, 24, of Chicago, is the Dallas auditions standout. The model/musician/background vocalist impresses the judges with her pipes. Plus, Simon likes mohawked Zpia's edgy look. Also memorable is Jessica Brown, 24, of Longview, Texas. The former drug addict and mother of two hits a few pitchy notes in "I'll Stand By You," but she's sweet, humble and her background story pulls on the heartstrings.

Finally, in the creepiest audition ever, Paul Marturano, 32, of New Hope, Pa., professes his love for judge Paula Abdul with a song he penned about stalking her. It's so disturbing he has to be escorted out of the Philly audition room. So weird! Even judge Randy Jackson asks, "Paul, have you been drinking?"

And yes, the judges are harsh, but that's part of the fun of "American Idol." While others may see their criticism as too nasty, I think if these "performers" are brave enough to sing in front of Simon, Randy and Paula, they're fair game.

"American Idol" airs Tuesday and Wednesday at 8 p.m. on Fox. Thankfully each episode airs for only an hour, unlike this week's two-hour shows, which dragged.

The final four teams travel from Osaka, Japan, to Taipei, Taiwan, on the second-to-last leg of "The Amazing Race." TK & Rachel begin three hours behind the others, and must complete a Speed Bump challenge on this leg, but the quick, cool couple catches up to the others, upsetting birthday girl Jen. Ronald & Christina maintain the lead, and are the first to check in at the Pit Stop at Chiang Kai-Shek Plaza. The dad and daughter are getting along much better, which has really helped them in the Race. TK & Rachel finish an impressive second, and my favorite underdogs, Nick & Donald, finish third. The grandson/grandfather duo beat quarrelsome couple Nate & Jen to the Pit Stop, earning a spot in the finals. Donald says his goal was to make it to the final three, and they do it; I'm hoping they win. Each of the final three teams is easy to root for -- I'm just happy Nate & Jen are out.

The season finale of "The Amazing Race" is Sunday at 8 p.m. on CBS.

On the season premiere of "Scott Baio is 46... & Pregnant," Chachi is going to be a daddy! First he freaks out when he finds out Renee is pregnant, calling an emergency meeting with his pals, where he reconciles with crazy John. He also calls Doc Ali, who says Scott is ready for fatherhood. So Scott buys a big, new house for his family, and begins "Daddies to Be" classes where he gets hands-on experience with a crying infant. He also finally proposes to Renee, and minutes later they find out she's carrying a baby girl. Scott says God must have a sense of humor, because he's not sure how he'll handle raising a daughter. Previews for the season look sweet. "This is the story of the most amazing, horrible, beautiful, scary, wonderful journey of my entire life," he says.

"Scott Baio is 46 ... & Pregnant," airs Sunday at noon, 10 p.m. and midnight on VH1.

On the season premiere of "Rock of Love 2," Bret Michaels is back for round two of his search for love. Twenty babes move into his mansion where he meets -- and makes out -- with at least half of them on the first night. The tour ends early for four -- Ashley; Missi; Erin, who was an early VIP; and Courtney, who is so wasted she can't get out of bed for the elimination ceremony. Sassy Jackye admits to Bret she's anxious about being there, so she leaves voluntarily. Too bad, she seemed like a real firecracker. Early notables include Kristy Joe, who is stunning, but dull, and is outspoken about her fear of germs. (Seriously, germaphobes need not apply for this sleazefest of a show!) Then there are the girls who are not exactly inhibited, such as Inna, who impresses Bret with her splits, and Angelique, who is the first to remove her top. My favorite frontrunner is VIP Megan. If you think the blonde knockout looks familiar, you're right. The Playboy model was the co-winner of season three of the CW's "Beauty and the Geek."

"Rock of Love 2" airs Sunday at 11 a.m., and 9 and 11 p.m. on VH1.

On "How to Look Good Naked," Carson Kressley continues his perception revolution with Marlo, 29, a survivor of Hodgkin's Lymphoma. Marlo gained almost 50 pounds when she was sick, and now she says she feels trapped inside someone else's body. Carson takes five days to teach Marlo the basics of fashion, and brings back the confident, passionate, "old" Marlo. Carson even gets her to pose draped only in a sheet, and her photo is prominently displayed on the side of a building for passersby to see. Carson's two for two on the nude front!

"How to Look Good Naked" airs Friday at 9 p.m. on Lifetime.

On "The Girls Next Door," Hef and the girls are invited to the Monte Carlo Television Festival. On the way, the fabulous foursome makes pit stops in Paris to sightsee and St. Tropez to party for Kendra's birthday. The girls attend a posh cocktail party at the state minister's mansion, where they meet other television stars. The girls wander out one night in search of the prince and are stopped by the police. "We were like, hey, we're just coming to say hi to the prince. One thing led to another, which led us to jail!" Kendra laughs. They are detained and interrogated for four hours, but are magically rescued by their security guard. Luckily Hef's not too upset with his little jailbirds. Finally, the girls get to meet Prince Albert of Monaco, and Kendra says he's just like any other guy because he stares at her chest a lot!

"The Girls Next Door" airs Sunday at 10 p.m. on E!

... is Jen on "The Amazing Race." The birthday girl flips out when TK & Rachel catch up to the other teams. "I cannot believe they're here. It makes me sick," she complains. "That's hatred in my blood right now." Jen even accuses TK & Rachel of not working hard, which is false, considering they had to make up hours to catch up. Maybe if Jen would have relaxed and focused on her game, she and Nate wouldn't be eliminated before the final leg. Jen admits she and Nate neglected their relationship throughout the Race, and after they're eliminated, even he's crying! I feel bad for the guy.

A special honorable mention for Crybaby of the Week goes out to me, for tearing up during "American Idol" auditions. Temptress Browne, a 16-year-old football player from Philadelphia, says she's trying out in honor of her sick mother. Temptress is rejected by the judges, but they're kind enough to escort the crying teen out of the room where her proud family is waiting for her. It's a touching, emotional scene, as Simon admits he likes the girl and Paula hugs Temptress' wheelchair-bound mom.

• "My Fair Brady: Maybe Baby?" Sunday, 12:30 and 10:30 p.m., VH1.
• "The Millionaire Matchmaker," Tuesday, 11 p.m., Bravo.
• "The Real World/Road Rules Challenge: The Gauntlet 3," Wednesday, 10 p.m., MTV.
• "Making the Band," Jan. 28, 10 p.m., MTV.
• "Survivor: Micronesia -- Fans vs. Favorites," Feb. 7, CBS.
• "Flavor of Love 3," Feb. 11, 9 p.m., VH1.
• "Big Brother 9," Feb. 12, 9 p.m., CBS.
• "The Pussycat Dolls Present Girlicious," Feb. 19, The CW.
• "Keeping up with the Kardashians," March, E!