Q. How do you help young children learn patience?

A. This is a major feat that will take lots of tolerance -- and patience -- on your part. Here are some ideas you can try:

When you're going to make a call, tell your child you'll be on the phone for five minutes -- and that, when you're done, you'll do something fun (like baking cookies) together. Set a timer as you start the call. Of course you'll mention your time limit to the person you're calling so you can end the conversation when the timer goes off.

Ultimately, you'll be able to eliminate the timer and the rewards, but they're a great way to start.

Along the way, your child will sometimes become upset. Don't give in; it will just set a precedent that's almost impossible to break.

Use "teachable moments" throughout the day. For instance, the time when you're cooking dinner may require patience from your child. If your child is patient, praise him or her. And if the child can't tolerate not having your attention and ends up tantruming on the kitchen floor, well, you'll just have to tune that out.

Keep your expectations reasonable. All kids are different, and they learn patience at different rates.

Be specific when you talk about time. Avoid vague phrases like "in a while"; they're meaningless for a small child. Give actual time frames (like "three minutes"), or a visual cue like the position of the hands on the clock. Be sure that when you set a time you stick to it. As your child succeeds, you can extend the "patience time" incrementally.

Final thought: The best way to teach patience is to let your child see you being patient. When you're waiting in line or stuck in traffic, talk about your frustration and the way you're managing that feeling. Soon your child will follow suit.