You know the feeling of coming back to work from a lovely vacation, and wondering why daily existence has to be so drab and meaningless? That was the mood here Monday afternoon. Returning from a blah lunch, I was greeted by the blinking red light indicating voice mail. Oh, joy.

"Hi John this is Cassie Rodgers and I'm calling on behalf of SinuCleanse. You can contact me or my colleague Megan at the number 513-404-...."

	A well-shaved model puts SinuCleanse to work. Click photo for larger image.

Cassie had a perky young voice and a Midwesterny accent from nowhere. Her upbeat tone was modulated by a weariness that inevitably comes from making this sort of phone call probably 37 times a day.

"I am calling about our product, SinuCleanse, because I think you might be interested in writing a story about it. It's a form of nasal washing, which I know sounds gross, but actually offers a lot of benefits. (Giggle.) Um, especially when you add it to the daily routine of [excretory bodily function], shower and shave."

She paused half a beat, and continued:

"If you do it every day, it offers the benefits of reducing sinus and allergy symptoms. This product has been spotlighted on 'Oprah' and 'Gray's Anatomy' and 'The Office' and so I hope you are interested in writing a story about it."

That's an impressive array of media coverage. But my attention had already been captured: What's this daily routine again?

Those three alliterative actions are, in my roster of cultural references, the argot of Army barracks. What's a nice young PR woman doing, talking like drill sergeant?

"If you are interested, we can send you some samples, or can put you in touch with the doctor who created this product, Dr. Diane Heatley. Again, this is Cassie Rodgers and my number is 513-404-...."

I called the number and got the voice mail of Megan Licursi, who is principal of MLMC (Megan Licursi Marketing Communications of Amelia, Ohio). The outgoing message offered an e-mail address.

I wrote to Megan -- somehow it felt OK to be on first-name terms -- explaining that I was responding to Cassie's voice mail and that, while consumer health products are not usually my beat, I was personally interested because, like many people in Western Pennsylvania, I have clogged nasal passages due to the pollen and pollution.

But what also interested me, I said, "is the text of the pitch. I have played the message a few times and, if my ear passages are not clogged, too, I think I heard her say that SinuCleanse is 'a form of nasal washing, which I know sounds gross, but actually offers a lot of benefits. Especially when you add it to the daily routine of [that word], shower and shave.'

"To be sure, it has not troubled my ears -- I work in a newsroom! But I have to ask you, professionally: Is the term" -- no need to place it here again -- "calculated to get the attention of media people? I confess, it did catch my attention. Is it also used in press releases? Is the phrase part of your regular pitch for the product? Thanks for your attention."

Megan Licursi is a pro. At 7:15 p.m., she responded:

"Hey, John. My team and I had this exact discussion. But, when we were writing the pitch, there really wasn't a substitute word that conveyed that thought! In e-mail, we use the cartoon version to censor the pitch and avoid getting caught in spam filters. But, it does work to catch the attention of reporters such as you. In addition to the SSS angle (as we've taken to calling it), we've copied some of the language from our editorial coverage including the nose bidet, nasal douche, etc.

"Funny you should mention the Western Pennsylvania angle ... we've got several users in Pennsylvania who used and now swear by it -- enough so to send us comments :)

"So, I do hope Cassie nor I offended you. I'd be happy to send you a sample. If only for you, personally.

"Let me know.

"Thanks!

"--ML"

Suddenly, the world seemed a little brighter.

I have requested a sample of SinuCleanse, which I plan to use after shaving. If it works, you'll be the first to know.