Wake up call.

Two mothers have been charged with involuntary manslaughter for leaving their young children without adult supervision. In the absence of supervision, some of the children apparently were playing with matches and accidently started an inferno which resulted in the deaths of the five youngest among them. The mothers, according to published reports, had gone out for drinks.

The Rev. James Hogan is the pastor of Faithbridge Community Church in McKees Rocks (jehogan@hotmail.com).

We all reacted to this tragedy with some mixture of sympathy, revulsion, anger, condemnation and confusion. And there's no justification for leaving such young children alone to go out and have fun.

But we also reacted with a heavy dose of naivete.

We peer at the strange idea that some so young should be left alone to fend for themselves, so sure that this is an anomaly.

It's not.

Of all the differences between the suburbs and the city, the comfortable and the poor, this may be the one that slides most stealthily under the radar screen.

"Home Alone" isn't just the title of a funny film from the last decade, it's an everyday reality in dozens of communities and probably thousands of households around Pittsburgh.

I know. I see it every day.

When we first started our ministry in McKees Rocks, my eyes were closed to it as well. Then, in the first weeks after we began, we met "Little J." He came to church one Sunday, stayed after, and asked if he could come to our home for lunch. After some questions, we knew these facts: J's mom used county-provided day care during the week -- but she worked weekends and couldn't afford to pay for child care. Sometimes her sister was off work on Saturday and they'd trade for each other's help with the kids, but sometimes they both worked.

J's father? He'd met J once. He lives in Garfield with his girlfriend.

When my wife asked on that Sunday at what time J's mom left for work in the morning, he replied, "She has to be at the bus stop at seven." She'd be gone until at least seven in the evening.

We took J home and fed him and then he asked if we help him get into his house by boosting him up to a window because the door locks behind him when he leaves. Little J, who's since moved on with his mom to another community, was 4.

Also in those first weeks we saw a 12-year-old boy changing his 3-year-old cousin's diaper with the hands of a seasoned pro. He'd had to learn, because he'd been watching his sisters and cousins for three years -- since his older cousin, whose turn it had been to watch the kids, went to jail.

These were the first of dozens of similar tales we heard in our community -- which is six city blocks. Do the math.

How prevalent is the culture of kids being left to fend for themselves in Allegheny County? Very. It's not just here -- no, in the absence of dads and money, this is happening in every city -- but this is where we are. And where we are blind.

Every day, all over town, very young children are left in the care of children, or to fend for themselves. Thousands of kids. The sitter quit. The day care raised rates. The school suspended Billy. The boss said, "Be here or be fired."

There are layers of complexity when you dig into the "why" of these conditions. Chipping away at the damage and root causes is painstaking, enduring, sacrificial work. Becoming aware is the first step.

But fixing the problems and addressing the issues can't be optional. Rome did not collapse because Rome's enemies had bested Rome's military strength. Rome crumbled as its cultural underpinnings withered away.

Four generations of many kids in American cities, if not most, have been raised by Mom. The fifth generation of boys -- passing on their father's cold inheritance -- are preparing to bestow the children they won't raise on the women who will face hard choices with few good options. We, as the brothers and sisters of our neighbors, can no longer afford to slumber unaware.

It's time to wake up.