Ed Yozwick, Post-Gazette Click illustration for larger image.

A: As we grow older and have children, it's so important that our parents see us as adults and respect us in our own role as parents. But sometimes, in the excitement and joy of having a grandchild, new grandparents overdo it with gifts and simply overlook our wishes and reactions.

		Parenting 4 Kids Nationally accredited, 4 Kids Early Learning Network serves children and families throughout the Mon Valley. Through this column, 4 Kids staff members answer reader questions about raising children in the critical early years. E-mail questions for consideration to: questions@4kidsearlyed.org, or mail to: 4 Kids Questions, 445 Fourth St., Braddock, PA 15104.

Developing some guidelines for gift-giving by all extended family members may help -- both for the holidays and in the long run.

As you work on the guidelines, emphasize the importance of quality vs. quantity, and consider any space limitations in your home. Most importantly, encourage family members to remember that overstimulation by too many gifts can overwhelm and frustrate a young child.

You might create a list of gift suggestions, including tips about your daughter's favorite things, and information about clothing preferences and sizes. Try to make sure the list includes items of roughly equal value and interest, in order to minimize "gift competition" among grandparents.

Along the way, emphasize to both your daughter and the grandparents that the most treasured long-term memories are usually of simple things -- like baking cookies, reading holiday stories and watching traditional holiday movies together.

You can suggest that your parents share with your child a photo album of past holiday celebrations -- we find that children love to look at pictures of their parents when they were little.

Your child will, we think, be excited to hear about your early holidays and about traditions the family still observes. After all, along with the family's values and religious beliefs, these traditions are fundamental elements of the memories we carry as adults.

We hope these suggestions will help during your next holidays!