Do not read this while eating

	Stacy Innerst, Post-Gazette Click illustration for larger image. Morning File readers make their contribution

Attention, please. We are accepting no more nominations for the Nobel Prize in Environmental Cosmetic Surgery. We have a winner. His name is Lauri Venoy, a Norwegian businessman living in Miami. Mr. Venoy, with one giant leap of the imagination, has come up with an ingenious approach to two major problems facing America and the world: global warming and obesity. He wants to use human fat to develop bio-diesel fuel. Yes, he does.

It's a win-win. You give up your flab. The air gets cleaner. And fat would appear to be a renewable energy source.

Super-downsize me!

If you are a habitue of quick food joints, you needn't fear that Mr. Venoy and his posse will be hanging around outside, sizing you up for contributions. He'll get the stuff -- and we hope you've finished breakfast -- from liposuction.

Mr. Venoy's firm is signing an agreement with Jackson Memorial Hospital in Miami to recycle 3,000 gallons of human fat a week from its liposuction clinics, according to the Norwegian Web site Aftenposten.no/english. That can produce 2,600 gallons of bio-diesel -- enough to power a Hummer for a week or two.

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"Bumper sticker: My car runs on high performance fat"

"This is really a great fuel-saving idea. Remember hearing that overweight people waste fuel? Now you can drop a few pounds and fill up your Mercedes-Benz E320 in one stop. What's next, harvesting human triglycerides from dead people?"

"I don't want to be cremated, I want to be processed into auto-fuel."

"I like it. We need more fatty foods!"

"He's got south Florida. Add the potential supply from New York, Scottsdale, and Southern California, and liposuction cast-off may be the answer to our oil woes."

Bio-diesel basics

Bio-diesel can be produced from either plant oils or animal fat. It behaves like regular petroleum-based diesel in engines and is used as fuel for transportation and heating. ("Does it smell a little like a McDonald's in here, Doris?")

Bio-diesel as an alternative fuel is in its infancy. It had U.S. sales last year of 75 million gallons, compared to 4 billion gallons for ethanol, a fuel usually made from corn and blended with gasoline.

The market is there

Last year, Americans had about 455,000 liposuction operations, making fat removal the most popular cosmetic surgery procedure, according to the American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery. But in the last few years, liposuction, once used predominantly to reduce flabby abdomens, hips and thighs, "has become a tool to enhance the near-perfect body parts of the already fit," says The New York Times.

Some medical ethicists are concerned about a lack of standards or guidelines on what kinds of micro liposuction are too minor to be worth the risk. "Today the cutoff point is the pubic area, and what about tomorrow?" said Sheila M. Rothman, a professor of sociomedical sciences at Columbia University's public health school.

Dr. Rothman worries that these tiny procedures may lead to serial liposuction that will be viewed as a maintenance technique. The current model for this: Botox. Or the gym. "Maybe liposuction will become like a gym membership where you pay a doctor $10,000 for the year and you can have as much surgery as you want," Dr. Rothman told The Times.

Royal carbon footprint

The Prince of Wales wouldn't appear to have much fat to give up in the name of environmentalism, but he is doing his part. To reduce the royal carbon footprint, The Times of London reports, the Prince intends to cut back on his domestic and international flights, which put carbon emissions directly into the atmosphere. He intends to travel by train more frequently and as far as possible on regular scheduled service. ("That bloke across the aisle ... doesn't he look familiar?") He'll also replace many flights with car travel, and he'll convert his Jaguar and Land Rover to run on bio-diesel.

Time for fat Brits to put their giant carbon footprints forward in the service of the prince.