Even little kids over there speak it

Semi-trick question: What is the world's most commonly spoken language? No, not English. Or Spanish. The answer, of course, is Mandarin Chinese, because the answer to almost any question about "most" or "biggest" these days is some variation on the word "China."

Yes, the Chinese have the numbers and, any day now, the world's leading economy. Which is why Mandarin Chinese, the official language of the People's Republic of China, is suddenly hot in American schools, The Christian Science Monitor reports. It's estimated that between 25,000 to 50,000 children are taking Mandarin in school. Very impressive. Meanwhile, more than 200 million children in China are studying English. In fact, the number of English speakers in India and China -- 500 million -- now exceeds the number of mother-tongue English speakers in the world. That number is likely to peak at around 2 billion in the next decade, according to a British Council report.

Playing catch-up

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In American schools, 85 percent of foreign-language enrollment is in Spanish, according to the Council on the Teaching of Foreign Languages. Next comes French, followed far behind by Italian and German, then trace amounts of Russian, Japanese and Mandarin. As for colleges, fewer than 8 percent of U.S. undergraduates take a foreign language, and fewer than 2 percent study abroad. Foreign language majors account for just 1 percent of undergraduate degrees. American colleges and universities once had stiffer foreign language requirements, but they were watered down in the 1960s and '70s, according to the Austin American-Statesman.

Chalk it up to isolationism, national narcissism or any number of other isms. The point is, we're not in great shape to embrace an increasingly global economy, and JUST TALKING LOUDER won't work anymore. In January, President Bush, an EFL student (English as a First Language), proposed $57 million in federal spending to encourage the teaching of languages considered critical to national security, including Arabic, Farsi, Chinese, Japanese and Korean.

Speaking more softly won't work either

What used to be an advantage to both Britain and the United States -- the dominance of English on the international stage -- is now a liability that is beginning to undermine the competitiveness of both nations. Basically, everybody in the world of trade had to know English, so English-speaking countries got lazy and complacent. Now, the countries with people who know several languages -- the polyglots -- have significant competitive advantages over their monoglot rivals, including a vital understanding of different cultures, in a world getting rapidly smaller.

"We know from trade associations that small- and medium-sized British firms are losing a lot of business because they can't even answer calls from abroad on the switchboard," a British corporate exec told Reuters. Here, 22 percent of all Americans speak a language other than English, mainly Spanish, and many of these people have Spanish as their first language.

It's hard work!

From "Why Chinese Is So Damn Hard," by David Moser, University of Michigan Center for Chinese Studies:

"Chinese is not only hard for us, but it's also hard in absolute terms. Which means that Chinese is also hard for Chinese people. If you don't believe this, just ask a Chinese person. Most Chinese people will cheerfully acknowledge that their language is hard, maybe the hardest on Earth. They generally become aware at some point of the Everest-like status of their native language, as they, from their privileged vantage point on the summit, observe foolhardy foreigners huffing and puffing up the steep slopes. Those who undertake to study the language for any other reason than the sheer joy of it will always be frustrated by the abysmal ratio of effort to effect."

Achtung, Texas

Elizabeth Behrend, a 78-year-old fourth-generation Texan, still speaks a language that should have long since disappeared. She's one of 10,000 speakers of Texas German, a dialect that has survived much longer than most dialects of U.S. immigrants. Hans Boas, a Germanic linguistics professor at the University of Texas, attributes that mainly to settlement patterns, The Houston Chronicle reports. Unlike other German immigrant destinations, such as Pennsylvania and the Midwest, many Texas-bound Germans settled in rural, isolated communities, particularly in the Hill Country.

While foreign dialects typically die out after two generations, some Texas German families are into the fourth or even fifth generation. This, despite a few obstacles. During World War I, a wave of xenophobia stopped the sale of German papers while local governments banned speaking German in schools and churches. In Corpus Christi, a Lutheran pastor was whipped after he continued to preach in German despite a ban. World War II revived the stigma as some Germans were suspected of being Nazi sympathizers. In the 1940s, the state counted about 159,000 Texas-German speakers. With the number down to 15,000, the German dialect is expected to vanish within 30 years.

Some Texas German

die Stinkkatze: the skunk; literally, the stinking cat. Standard German: Stinktier, meaning stinking animal.

mitaus: direct translation from English "without" (with: mit; out: aus). Standard: ohne.

fur sicher: for sure, direct translation from English. Standard: na klar or sicherlich.

Das hat mich gebothered: that bothered me. Standard: das hast mich geargert.

To hear Texas German, visit www.tgdp.org

This could stump the Chinese

Laurance R. Doyle in The Christian Science Monitor:

"I think English is the most widespread language in history -- and perhaps the funniest. We still recite at a play, but we play at a recital. Our feet can smell, and our nose can run. On television shows we can have a 'guest host.' And when a lamp is out, it is not shining, but if the stars are out, they are.

"I once told some friends, whose first language was not English, the adage 'Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.' They did indeed eventually laugh with me about it -- a few days later, as it took some significant time to work out."

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Correction/Clarification: (Published Nov. 29, 2006) An item in this Morning File incorrectly attributed a story about the Texan German dialect to the Austin American-Statesman. The story came from The Houston Chronicle.