It has to be the worst sports nightmare for Kevin McClatchy and that mythical figure known as G. Ogden Nutting.

Not the Pirates' pathetic 5-15 start in an All-Star Game season in which McClatchy has said the team absolutely has to win after 13 consecutive years of losing. It has become pretty clear that doesn't especially bother anyone in management at team headquarters and probably won't until the fans get so disgusted that they stop going to PNC Park.

Mark Cuban.

"I think I could do a better job [running the Pirates]," Cuban wrote the other day in an exchange of e-mails.

The easy thing to say is that no one could do a worse job.

But that would be cheapening Cuban's brilliance as a sports owner, wouldn't it?

Have you noticed Cuban isn't afraid to spend money on his Dallas Mavericks? That they have the NBA's second-highest payroll behind the New York Knicks? That they finished the regular season with the league's third-best record? That they beat Memphis on Sunday night in their first-round playoff opener? That they're a legitimate threat to win it all?

I won't ask if you noticed that Cuban gave away more than 20,000 vouchers for a free airline flight to Mavericks fans on fan appreciation night at the team's final home game Wednesday night. That might hurt too much. I also won't tell you Cuban's response when asked via e-mail if he'd treat Pirates fans so royally if he owned his hometown club ...

Ah, what the heck?

"Of course," Cuban wrote back.

You can take it, right?

You know the next question.

Do you think Cuban could win with the Pirates if he owned them?

"I think you could," Cuban said on Dan Patrick's ESPN radio show last week. "I think you can be smart and compete."

Not necessarily as the Yankees or Red Sox, Cuban said, but not as Tampa Bay or Florida or, for that matter, the Pirates as they currently are, either.

"You couldn't keep up with Steinbrenner," Cuban told Patrick. "That would be a never-ending hole. They have so much cable money there. They have so much television money ...

"But I think you can be in the middle tier and compete effectively. ... You've seen Minnesota do it. You've seen Oakland do it. At least for a short period of time, they present themselves as a top-tier team."

Cuban said he has investigated buying the Pirates but has been told the team isn't for sale.

"I think one of the reasons McClatchy won't sell is, that if you can deal with the abuse that goes with losing, you can make $15 million or $20 million a year," he said on Patrick's show, mentioning figures that McClatchy has disputed as the Pirates' profit. "Would you put up with the abuse for $15 million or $20 million a year? ...

"Not me. Oh, no. I'd have to win. Winning vs. losing money, I'd take winning every time."

Cuban said he will lose some money with the Mavericks this season but is getting closer to breaking even.

"It's a simple equation," he wrote in his e-mail. "Running a team to break even vs. running it to make $15 million or $20 million means a lot more money for player development and players."

This isn't the first time Cuban has talked publicly of buying the Pirates. His comments haven't always been received warmly here -- and I'm not speaking of just McClatchy and Nutting. Cuban has been accused by some of trying to curry favor in his hometown by talking about being a hero with a team he knows isn't for sale, that, if push came to shove, he wouldn't buy the club if it were on the market.

"You can't argue a negative," Cuban wrote. "I have nothing to gain by making my feelings known. I'm a frustrated fan like everyone else and I think I could do a better job."

Asked about actor Michael Keaton's opening-day comments that McClatchy and Nutting would be wise not to continue to put an inept product on the field and assume blind loyalty from their fan base, Cuban wrote: "It drives everyone crazy that the Buccos have lost so many years in a row. I feel the worst for the players. I know how much it hurts to lose."

Here's hoping Cuban keeps speaking out when asked about the Pirates, if for no other reason than to prod McClatchy and his invisible partner, Nutting, maybe even shame them into actually trying to field a competitive team.

We can dream, can't we?

"I don't know what will happen, but if [McClatchy] is ever interested in selling, he knows where to find me," Cuban wrote.

If nothing else, that thought gives Pirates fans something to grasp in these dark days.

Hope.

Hey, it's better than nothing, isn't it?