DEAR CAT: I go to a coffee shop every day and see the same pretty girl in there. We're familiar enough to say hi, but nothing more. I want to talk to her, but she's always reading or on her phone, and I don't want to bother her. Is there a way to know if my introduction would be welcome or uninvited?

-- WANT TO TALK

	Do you want to ask a question? Send an e-mail to questions@ catscall.com or write to:   Catherine Specter   Post-Gazette   34 Blvd. of the Allies   Pittsburgh, Pa.   15222   ... or visit her Web site at catscall.com

DEAR WANT: It'd be great if single people wore T-shirts that read "Please say hi," but it wouldn't guarantee their interest. One thing is for sure, the longer you wait the less you'll appear as a potential date and the more you'll become just some coffee shop dude who stares at her every day. You have nothing to lose by saying hello. Will she like you? Who knows. The only way to know for sure is to take the plunge.

Cat's Call: If we already knew the outcome of every action, we'd never learn a thing.

---

DEAR CAT: I was casually talking to my landlord, and she started complaining about other tenants who are African-American. Those tenants and I are neighbors, so I kept my mouth shut even when she used the "n" word. They've always seemed like nice people even though they've had a few problems with her. I don't feel right paying money to someone with those values, but I have a lease. Can you put my mind at ease until I can move out?

-- XXX

DEAR XXX: Of course you kept your mouth shut; otherwise next week you'd have no heat. It seems callous, but there's a reason people separate business from personal matters. Look, for all you know your dry cleaner is a bigot, but he presses a shirt like nobody's business. Would you still go there if you knew? No, but only because you have the choice. You don't have that option when you're bound by a lease.

Cat's Call: Stay cool, remain friendly with your neighbors, and hightail it outta there when you get the chance.