DEAR CAT: You have it backward. You wrote that Internet dating encourages duplicity, but in my experience people are more likely to 'show up' when they just have to log in to a chat. They talk more openly because there are no distractions. And they get a better sense of a person without superficial judgment. You should call that one again.

-- RE-CALL, PLEASE

DEAR RE: Reach up quick, because the point is flying over your head. The only real distraction on a date should be your date! Logging in to a site is not like opening a car door. Dating implies engaging in a real social outing. And, please, superficiality has its place, or singles wouldn't post pics with their profiles.

Cat's Call: I'm all for Internet dating, but real dating it's not.

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DEAR CAT: Your response to the overweight guy was very p.c. and deftly handled. But you avoided a big point: Fat is not hot. Why won't people just admit it? Unless that guy has a medical problem, he should work out and quit complaining. Then he'd have his pick of girls. We Americans have become so used to obesity that we equate it with heartiness. But it's not hearty, it's anti-heart, and anti-hot.

-- SHAPE UP MAN

DEAR SHAPE: Wow, tell us how you really feel. Excessive weight does put a burden on the heart, in more ways than one. The thing is: That guy wasn't looking to score left and right; he was looking for "the one." Hey, he's one of millions looking for that. But getting buff could only help his cause. Looking good = confidence = massive ego = attention from women.

Cat's Call: Ho-humming isn't hot no matter what you look like.