Electrons are so negative

	Stacy Innerst, Post-Gazette Click illustration for larger image.

Forget good chemistry. Successful couples need good physics. Or so Richard Ecob, an Oxford graduate, seems to be saying. He adapted a system "for modelling atoms in radioactive decay" to investigate how we look for partners. We know what you're thinking, and we agree: Radioactive decay doesn't sound like a promising basis for marriage. Or for a hug, for that matter. But from an otherwise incomprehensible report on BBC Online, this sentence caught our fancy: "[Ecob] found that 'super daters,' people who have many short relationships, have a good effect on others' lives. This is because they break up weak couples, forcing their victims to find better relationships." So all those people who have been maligned as homewreckers, Casanovas and sluts, far from being moral dwarves, are doing society a big favor.

Dad, is that you?

Perhaps some of those homewreckers -- I mean, "super daters" -- produced more than radioactive decay. One in 25 dads could unknowingly be raising another man's child, according to the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health. (Some people will do anything to sell journals of epidemiology.) Paternity surprises -- or as the polite scientists prefer, "paternal discrepancy" -- could become more common with the growing use of DNA profiling and genetic testing for organ donation and criminal identification. In the United States, such tests more than doubled to 310,490 between 1991 and 2001. In the United Kingdom, about a third of pregnancies are unplanned, and one in five women in long-term relationships has had an affair. Other developed countries have reported similar figures.

Getting jerked around

From the AP
• Man Buys Smoker, Finds Human Leg Inside • Coach Stops Runaway Horse by Biting Ear • Man Allegedly Tries to Use 'Blurry' $100 • Police Break Up Brawl at Chuck E. Cheese • Suggestive Card Ruffles Farmer's Feathers • Nerds to Auction Themselves to Women • Toilet to Tap? San Jose Probes Plan • Seattle to Allow Pygmy Goats As Pets • Yankees Rookies Dress Up in Oz Costumes

You're on the phone with your significant other. The DNA results have turned up no paternity discrepancy. And your relationship shows no sign of radioactive decay. Still, you have this nagging thought: Is my beloved a jerk? Finally, we have a foolproof way of finding out. Not to get too technical, but it's called the Jerk-O-Meter, and it comes out of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. Wired.com reports that researchers there are developing software for cell phones that would analyze speech patterns and voice tones to measure levels of stress, empathy and listening intensity. They see the Jerk-O-Meter as a tool for improving relationships, because it would make people more attentive because they know they're being monitored. (Wait a minute. Is this really new . . ."Your call is being monitored for quality assurance" . . . ?) If your attention is straying, a phone message pops up, warning, "Don't be a jerk!" A good score would prompt, "Wow, you're a smooth talker." The Jerk-O-Meter also could report on the other person. Example: "This person is acting like a jerk. Do you want to hang up?"

Gas-savers

The Christian Science Monitor found some energy-saving ideas around the country.

Some companies are encouraging telecommuting for jobs that can be done at home.

Atlanta pays commuters $3 a day for three months if they switch to "clean commutes," such as bicycles and van pools.

Car-sharing companies, which offer cars that can be reserved on an hourly or daily basis, are springing up, using many gas-sipping hybrid cars.

The owner of some gasoline stations in Milwaukee is giving a discount to taxicab drivers.

Are we there yet?

Gasoline prices will cost a family with two cars $533 more this year than last -- $917 more than two years ago. Regular unleaded is now $2.55 a gallon nationally, according to GasPriceWatch.com, $2.79 in California. While SUVs remain the nation's top-selling car, sales are sluggish with a mere 4.1 percent increase last year. Sales of the absurd Hummer, which, on a downhill run, can get into double figures on gas mileage, declined by 21 per cent. In contrast, hybrids, which get 40-60 miles a gallon, rose over 25 percent to nearly 44,000. There is a hybrid tax credit -- $1,500 for this year and declining 25 percent a year until it's phased out. Hybrids account for less than 1 percent of nearly 17 million vehicles sold in the US, says the BBC. Industry experts say a massive switch to hybrids will happen only if gas hits $5 a gallon.

Hold the ice picks?

Good news for terrorists and non-terrorists alike: You may be able to carry razor blades, small knives, scissors, ice picks and your bow and arrow set on your next flight. The Transportation Security Administration meets soon to discuss reducing checkpoint hassles. It would also mean you wouldn't have to take off your shoes unless they set off the metal detector, are flagged by a computer screening system, look "reasonably suspicions" or have smoke coming out of them. (That last one was our idea. Just a suggestion.)

At least he deserves it

Sign at Metro Heating, Banksville Road: "Hines Ward should run for the state Legislature and give himself a raise."

Post by Mike Madison on pittsblog.blogspot.com