Further evidence that humankind is doomed crossed my desk yesterday, when I discovered that, thanks to a young man who left the world of high technology in favor of the realm of high fashion, it is now possible for a woman to become too fat for her purse.

Pablo Holman, who downsized the laptop computer to something the size of a passport, worked with the world's only private space exploration agency, has invented the Tsaya. It is a small purse that straps to a woman's thigh, and will hold her cell phone, credit cards, some cash and, if necessary, the change after she has spent $79 buying the thing.

Holman took me through his curriculum vitae: He was raised outside of Anchorage, Alaska, where he spent his youth salmon fishing and dodging black bears. He moved on through a variety of jobs, notably one for a privately run company that tried to put a man into space. He worked on a team that created OQO, a pocket-sized computer that packs the wallop of a desktop.

Then, destiny summoned.

"I took a break from that to make this product, which is what I think the world needs: a thigh holster for a cell phone."

Yes, I told him. I had heard the anguished cries myself, but had assumed it was cats fighting on my front porch.

Holman directed me to his Web site, where a luscious blonde model sprawls across a couch, a Tsaya gracing her upper leg. No, Holman said, she is not his wife. Nor is she a model.

"She makes more than you and I do combined," he said. "Commercial real estate development."

Pablo, I asked, how did it come to this?

Holman took me through a brief history of the cell phone, from electronic brick through its evolution to plastic lump with an antenna to the sliver of silver most of them now resemble. Through it all, men, that is to say those not wearing the Utilikilt, tucked them into belt holsters, a nice accessory to go along with their plastic shirt pocket liners.

"Even today you don't see women hanging that phone off their belt," Holman said. "They just won't do that. They have to have their phone now. It has gotten smaller. But their outfits still don't accommodate it. Even though phones have gotten small, they have to take a whole handbag in order to have their phone. Or they have to pack a boyfriend who can carry all that stuff for them."

To spare women the fate of sharing a night out with a man, Holman stepped into the void, examined the surrounding terrain, fixed on the female thigh, and invented a strap-on purse.

His wife, by the way, declines to wear one, but only because she is well outside the target market of women under the mid-30s.

"There's a night club somewhere in Pittsburgh where this is just going to fit in fine," he said.

This is where it gets tricky. The legs of the east are required for such things as walking, hoisting, kicking -- utilitarian endeavors. On the west coast, judging from Holman's Web site, legs are accessories. The order form for a Tsaya requires the purchaser to register her thigh size.

"There's never a right purse for every woman," Holman said. "This isn't the right purse for some women. The women who want this already have nice legs. That's kind of limiting the market somewhat."

What, I asked him, is he going to do if an order comes in from Rosie O'Donnell? The pause was deafening. Clearly, this was your typical man of science, who assumes his discoveries will only be used for the good of mankind.

"If Rosie O'Donnell buys one? I think we have a problem," he said.