It's almost a cliche that what satisfies people about the work they do isn't just the money they get out of it, but, more importantly, the recognition and respect they receive. That has vital implications for effective leadership and smart hiring, but its greatest impact may be in their own self-respect.

The simple fact is, though business is filled with metaphors of war and competitive sports, the most successful business people I know are respectful of their customers, vendors and employees. You do not get the best from any of these three by minimizing their recognition. Sometimes, this isn't always obvious.

When I lived in Silver Spring, Md., the posh place to live was Bethesda, and my wife, Judy, found the house of her dreams there. Today, it would go for at least $800,000, but of course, back then, we paid a fraction of that. The house was being sold by the owner. When Judy took me to see this house, I fell in love with it, too. But, I'm thinking, the more I tell the owner I love it, the more I'm going to have to pay for it. If I keep finding faults with this "lousy" house, clearly they ought to charge me less. So, instead of telling the owner how much I liked his house, I found all kinds of faults with it.

Now, on the other hand, I understand that a house is a very personal thing. Owners are very proud of their homes. And an owner wants to sell it to people who also are going to love it. So every fault you find is an insult to the owner, and creates resistance to his or her wanting to sell it to you.

In fact, when we made an offer to the guy, I remember him saying, "I thought you didn't like it." A more reasonable approach is, "Boy, I love this house. Is there anyway you can do better on the price?" I'm sure I could have bought it for less if I had not been so obnoxious to him.

My friend, John Godfrey, invented a game called Dr. Nim in the 1960s and brought it to market. It taught people the rudiments of computers using marbles. Some people just couldn't see the ingeniousness of it and took a "so what" attitude.

Other people went gaga over it, and John tells me there are still Dr. Nim clubs on the Internet and that the game is still being sold on eBay. John is a very good-natured guy, and when someone went gaga over his invention -- which he was very proud of -- he would very likely give it to them, even though the retail price was more than $30.

The other great example of the importance of recognition and self-respect is when Judy and I went with another couple to Jamaica. We had a wonderful time. As we drove through the countryside we saw a stand where one of the natives was carving sculptures.

When we got out of the car and looked at the sculptures up close, Judy fell in love with one of them. It was a bird that he had carved. And I forget what he wanted, something like $30, which I thought was very reasonable. But at times we are persuaded by others. My friend, standing next to me says, "Jack, he'll take less."

So I say, "How much will you take? Will you take less than the $30? He says, "Yes. I'll take $25."

My friend whispers to me, "Jack, he'll take less."

I say to the sculptor, "Would you take less than $25 for this sculpture?"

He says, "No way, it's $25."

My friend then whispers: "Jack, walk toward the car. He'll change his mind."

Don't ask me why I listened to him, but I did. Judy keeps saying in my ear: "I really love that bird. I really want that sculpture."

So now, we have our hands on the car door handles, just about to get in, and I say to my friend, "I don't hear him calling us back."

He says, "Drive away, he'll call you back. Just start slow."

So sure enough I start slow, but I don't hear him calling us back. And Judy keeps saying, "I really like that bird."

I say, "Larry, now what do I do with you and your bright ideas?"

He says, "Go back tomorrow. The worst you'll have to do is pay $25."

So sure enough, we go back the next day and the same sculptor is there. I say, "How much do you want for that bird sculpture?" He says, "$30."

I say, "Well yesterday you wanted to sell it to me for $25."

He says: "That was yesterday, before I found out how rude you were, walking away. It's $30 and not a dime less."

So I take out $30 and say, "God bless you." We still have the bird. Judy still loves it!

Here is a guy who is obviously not rich, who is working as an artisan, trying to make a buck, and this ugly American is trying to negotiate him down. Don't ask me why. And whether it's $25 or $30 or $35, what's the difference? I truly respected him for sticking to his guns the second day. I had injured his pride, and he was restoring it.

The men who built our house in Pittsburgh, true artisans, were very proud of their work, taking care that every nail hit its mark. In my opinion, you don't see that kind of workmanship in southern Florida, where we previously had a house built. To be candid, in Pittsburgh, bringing the workmen coffee and doughnuts every morning and heaping praise on them for the quality of their work certainly did not hurt the job that they were doing.

The best example I have of pride and self-esteem happened when I was starting my last company, Actronics. I sent my partner over to look at some space on the North Side, and he came right back with a report that the owners wanted $10 a square foot and wouldn't budge.

So I went to see them. It didn't take me long to appreciate that they had invested a lot of their time in finishing off this warehouse space during the evenings, weekends and holidays. You could see the pride they invested in this project. One of the two brothers who owned the building took me on a tour, pointing out all the details and the overall workmanship. When he finished the tour, about all I could say was that this space was certainly well worth $10 or more a square foot. But I knew I couldn't afford $10 a square foot. We were just a start-up! And I told them that.

At first, they took it as an insult, but I explained to them -- it was the truth -- that I would have to stay in my garage because our budget couldn't stretch that far. I convinced them that I wasn't questioning their workmanship -- just my own budget limitations.

I told them that I could afford to pay somewhere between $6 and $8 a square foot and once we started getting sales, and certainly when we got positive cash flow, well, then I could pay $10, and I wouldn't be overpaying. It was worth it. There was no question about it. I asked them to have some empathy for people who are just starting a company, where money is tight and where there are no sales.

They finally agreed to take -- and I forget the exact amount -- but I want to say $8 a square foot. I would be willing to have a lease that said that after three years we'd pay the $10.

And then they had additional space that they hadn't fixed up that we needed for storage. Well, they wanted $6 for that. I said, "For the first three years, we'll pay you $4. After three years, we'll pay you $6. Because we've got to watch the few dimes we have left."

They said: "We'll tell you what. We will do all this if you let us invest in the company." And we did. I thought it was a good idea to have the landlord be an investor. I said, "yes," and he said he'd even pay for our utilities for the first year. Truly, very generous of them.

And what this really boiled down to was an understanding that I wasn't saying that their workmanship was not worth $10. It was that I couldn't afford it. And so they agreed and went even further once they understood that I wasn't giving a poor evaluation of the job they did; just the opposite. I appreciated their work!

So at the end of the day, you will do better if you are sincerely respectful when it's warranted. And I don't mean a superficial appreciation, bow or even a nod. But when it's warranted, deserved, earned, be truly respectful. Despite all the tough talk you hear from and about entrepreneurs, courtesy and respect will more often win the day. Treat people the way that you'd like to be treated. It is just another way of demonstrating the Golden Rule!