Traveling by commercial airline is hard work.

		Cooper Munroe a freelance writer for PG North, lives in Fox Chapel (coopermunroe@comcast.net).

Add four children and traveling by air becomes sadomasochism.

I know this firsthand because on New Year's Day, my husband and I returned to Pittsburgh with our four kids -- ages 7 years to 8 months -- after a week in Florida visiting my parents. We used two planes to get there and one to get back.

But it is not the kids who make it grueling -- it's the grownups.

In fact, grownups hindered the possibility of an agreeable trip even before we arrived at the airport the day after Christmas.

Although they had the ages of my kids in their computer, the airline seated all my children in separate seats, alone, sprinkled around the plane.

The 7-year-old could probably handle, even welcome, a seat independent of her parents. But, come on -- the baby? I mean maybe some nice stranger would be willing to feed him his bottle and change his dirty diapers while I read People magazine and filed my nails at the front of the plane, but I doubt it. And how about our sticky, 3-year-old, wild-man son who likes to climb over plane seats? What Good Samaritan would deal with that? Our 5-year-old daughter loves her Game Boy so much, she probably wouldn't notice the guy sitting next to her had a tattoo of a bloody knife on his forearm and multiple piercings about his head, right?

What was the airline thinking? I tried to appeal to the ticket agent's sense of maternal compassion when I called the airline the day before our departure, but all I got was, "You have to deal with it when you get on the plane."

Airline employees had not showed up for work, baggage was lost, computers were down and flights were cancelled, we were informed upon arrival at the airport. Somehow, miraculously, we escaped those quagmires, but we still had to get through security.

I understand security is an imperative, and I am glad the process is thorough. But I am curious: Why does a 3-year-old -- who is screaming "I don't want to take off my shoes!" -- have to take off his shoes? Why do I, an obviously overwhelmed mother of numerous kids, holding a baby and way too many bags, have to remove my sweater? And what is it about the configuration of a breast pump that makes it necessary to take it apart -- in front of 1,500 people?

We arrived at the gate just in time to "board with small children" and I am amazed, as flustered as we were, that we actually sorted out our indecipherable seating arrangement. It went something like this: If 5C switches with 7B and 12A takes 14F and 23D stays where he is, then each of our kids has a parent almost at his or her side!

Because of a delay in Pittsburgh, we had five minutes to catch our connection to Florida when we landed in Charlotte, and the connecting flight, of course, was at the opposite end of the terminal. We pretended we were "The Incredibles" family and ran down the corridors and on to the plane.

At first I did not notice the older woman in the next row making grumpy faces at me. When I finally saw her, I smiled. She scowled.

"Hi," I said, hoping a salutation would lighten her up.

She rolled her eyes and, sotto voce, said to her husband, "This is going to be the longest hour-and- a-half flight we've ever had."

OK, she was surrounded by kids (not all mine) but I am being honest when I say my kids weren't being too bad. Sure, the older ones were enthusiastically playing their Game Boys and the baby was making excited baby noises, but no one was whining or crying or being rude or throwing up or pouring apple juice on her head.

"Would you like to change seats with me?" I asked the couple, because at least then they would have one side that was kid-free.

"No," the wife answered curtly as she flashed me another hairy eyeball.

For the rest of the trip, I was all over my kids for the slightest noise, which, of course, made them louder and me more stressed. The lady kept rolling her eyes and making mad "hrumph" sounds.

By the end of the flight we were all miserable.

The thing is, it doesn't have to be that way.

If the crabby lady had just accepted the fact that for an hour and a half of her life, she had to be seated near kids (it was the holidays, by the way, and lots and lots of kids were traveling, so the odds were against her to begin with), it would have made that flight better for her, not to mention for her husband, my husband, my kids and me.

But it is more than that.

News story after news story tells us that the airline industry crisis and the constant terrorist threat -- and all the complexity that goes along with those things -- makes traveling more complicated, stressful and rough on the travelers and on airline employees than ever before.

It is cruddy conundrum, but, unfortunately, it is the only one we've got.

Since it's not going to change anytime soon, what would happen if we all tried to make the best of it? Doesn't one of the finest things about human nature -- our sense of community -- come out when we face common inconveniences like, say, a big snowstorm? When we are all in that long line at the airport or stuffed together in an airplane, trying to juggle seats or control young children, a positive, caring, "we are all in this mess together" attitude from fellow travelers and airline employees would at least make a not-so enjoyable experience tolerable.

You know: Can't we all just get along?

At some point, a great innovator is going to show up and remake the airline industry. I hope that the present system will be scrapped and a new, cutting-edge, efficient airline system will take its place.

When that happens, my mother has a good idea that I hope some airline will use: a family section on airplanes, fully equipped with movies, kid food (no turkey pastrami on rye with Brussels sprout coulis for $10 there!) and usable changing tables in the bathrooms. Or better yet, a family-oriented airline that would cater to families with young kids, that would never, ever seat parents and children apart. (Hey, Southwest, here's your chance.)

But, if a family section or a whole family-oriented airline isn't possible, perhaps, for the comfort of all of us, there could at least be some family-free flights designated for those travelers who can't stand kids. Call it Grump Air.