Dear Abby doesn't take back her advice very often. Especially if her suggestion is sound.

For example, in her advice column scheduled for publication next Monday, Abby told a letter-writer signed "Stuck in a Love Triangle" that she should admit to her husband that she had been unfaithful.

"To save the marriage," Abby wrote, "he might be willing to change back to the man who bowled you over in the first place."

The "bowled" reference was no accident. Jeanne Phillips, who took over the Dear Abby column from her mother, Pauline Phillips, about 10 years ago, was playing off the fact that "Stuck" had strayed from her vows after falling for her bowling instructor.

The letter writer sounded distraught enough. According to Heather Hollingsworth, a reporter with The Associated Press, "Stuck" described herself as a 34-year-old mother of three who had been married for 10 years to a man who was "greedy, selfish, inconsiderate and rude."

So rude, in fact, that her husband had given her a bowling ball for her birthday -- complete with the holes drilled to fit his fingers. He even had his name, "Gene," embossed into it.

"Stuck" told Abby that it was the gift that got the ball rolling with bowling instructor "Franco."

The column was sent to newspaper subscribers last week. (For years, the Post-Gazette published "Dear Abby" as well as the advice column "Ann Landers." We no longer do.)

It was an editor at one of the newspapers who noticed that "Stuck" and her problem sounded awfully familiar.

As familiar as an episode of "The Simpsons."

Fans of the animated comedy might recall that in a first-season episode titled "Life on the Fast Lane," Homer gave Marge a bowling ball for her birthday. And the suave bowling instructor who seduced her was Jacques.

A little investigation by the folks at the Kansas City-based Universal Press Syndicate has led them to believe that the letter from "Stuck" was a hoax and Monday's column has been pulled.

Life may imitate art, but it doesn't imitate "The Simpsons." At least, not very often.

Signed, Circumnavigating the city
Dear Post-Gazette,
I understand that several Downtown streets will be closed Saturday morning for the city's St. Patrick's Day parade and festival. Does the Post-Gazette have the details about the detours? If so, would the newspaper be kind enough to print them?

Signed, Following our leaders
Dear Post-Gazette,
My friends tell me that Bishop Robert W. Duncan Jr. missed last week's meeting of the Pittsburgh diocesan council because he was attending a meeting of another group. Have there been any concerns expressed among the clergy, and what does Bishop Duncan have to say about it?

Signed, Dumb as a sledgehammer
Dear Post-Gazette,
My partner and I are burglars. Sunday night we broke into a Squirrel Hill jewelry store. But we don't know much about jewelry and ended up with some watches that were the lowest-end stuff in the store. Where did we go wrong?

Post Your Problems does not appear today
Dear Yvonne Zanos,
We really missed your consumer column in today's newspaper. Thank goodness it will be back next week. Visit her archive to read previous columns.