Sunday, December 14, 2003

By Bob Batz Jr., Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

To succeed on the Pittsburgh singles scene, Dale Musselman says, you can't be single-minded.

	Pam Panchak, Post-Gazette Dan Musselman, 32, mingles at a wine-tasting social organized by the Pittsburgh Wine Brats Beaujolais Nouveau and Georges Deboeuf at DesignSpace in the Strip. Click photo for larger image.

That's why the 32-year-old software project manager from Ross has come to an event he knows is going to be populated by dogs.

A poodle and a Chihuahua mix are special guests at the Animal Friends Bow Wow fun- and fund-raiser, which the shelter's Young Professionals Committee held at Bossa Nova, Downtown. It's a Wednesday night, and the place is packed with people, one of whom could be the cute, sweet, smart woman Musselman is looking for.

From a small town near Gettysburg, Musselman came here to attend Robert Morris, where he earned his MBA before settling in the North Hills. After breaking up with his girlfriend of four years, he found himself single in a town he hardly knew, with very little dating experience and hardly any friends.

So he pushed himself out there, starting with joining an activities group. Members were older, but the group got him out and about. And he met someone. It was a guy, but the guy got him involved in a US Airways co-ed softball team as well as the burgeoning circuit of events for young professionals. Before he knew it, he was being auctioned off at a charity bachelor's auction and meeting more people.

"My social life just skyrocketed," says Musselman, who since that time has dated many different women. Many of them he meets at social events like this one, which he feels play to his strengths, such as conversation.

He describes himself as "an above-average intelligence, OK-looking guy," who tries to groom and dress well and regularly works out. But, "I'm not good at picking up chicks in the bar." So he interacts with them at Pittsburgh Singles Volunteer Network events, or at happy hours put on by groups such as Pittsburgh Young Professionals.

It's key, Musselman says, to go to the right events and venues and to go to some you normally wouldn't try, to keep your options diverse.

You need to know what's going on, but if you're out there, it's not hard to connect with calendars and e-mail lists. Or ask an expert like Musselman, who can make recommendations such as New Economy Nights at the O'Reilly Theater (free food, free beer, discounted show).

He thinks his 30s demographic is one of the smallest and most "challenging" on this "big small town" scene. But being single is losing its appeal, and he's starting to seriously seek a long-term relationship. He thinks there are plenty of women with whom he could be happy, and he's dating a couple of prospects.

But until he's sure, he goes out to events such as this one with an open mind -- and without a date. As a buddy who's here with him says, "Why take sand to the beach?"

E-mail this story   Print this story