Steel Advice: Make pre-wedding party stand out from holiday gatherings

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DEAR STEEL ADVICE: My granddaughter is getting married in early June 2015 in Atlanta. I live in Pittsburgh and am giving the couple a party, a brunch, in late December. It is a family affair, men, women, children and was wondering what to call it so that people will bring gifts. At first I considered calling it a shower, but didn't want to scare the men away. Suggestions are welcomed. I would like to send a “heads-up” email to all the family around June. Thank you.

— GRANDMA

DEAR GRANDMA: Call the party a holiday celebratory brunch given in honor of your granddaughter. Review your invitation list with your granddaughter to be sure no one in the family is inadvertently omitted or overlooked. Some emails never make it past the recipient’s junk mailbox. So consider sending a “save the date” printed card that can be generic or coordinated with other wedding stationery. A printed card adds flair and is sophisticated. Little touches will distance the party from an ordinary family holiday gathering. You want the brunch to be a memorable beginning to the couple’s wedding party whirl. When you send the actual invitations, probably in late October, have the couple’s gift registry stores printed at the bottom of the invitation. Make no mistake: Noting where the couple is registered is a polite way of saying “bring a gift”!

 DEAR STEEL ADVICE: I recently broke up with my boyfriend, and I have a box of stuff that he has given me. Should I hold onto it for old times’ sake or get rid of it?

— PUZZLED

DEAR PUZZLED: Get rid of it! Holding on to a box of memorabilia from your ex-boyfriend does not help you move forward. The box is a concrete reminder of him and your relationship. Look at the box long enough and your logic can be distorted. You will forget why you broke up and begin to second guess yourself.

Return any family heirlooms or other things he has given you that may not have been his to give in the first place. T-shirts, mugs and miscellaneous souvenirs go to the donation bin. Love letters and cards get shredded. After you dispose of the things that remind you of him, mentally put this ex-boyfriend in a canoe and send him downstream.

 


Need some Steel Advice? Email questions to: pgsteeladvice@gmail.com or write to Mary Ann Wellener, Steel Advice Column, c/o Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, 34 Blvd. of the Allies, Pittsburgh, PA 15222. Follow Mary Ann on Twitter at @PGSteelAdvice.

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