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Friday, October 18, 2002

By Munch

There's something very reassuring and at the same time just vaguely foreboding about the Sewickley Hotel, Munch was thinking the other day. But, as happens inevitably on the odd occasions when Munch exceeds the minimum daily adult requirement for, you know, thinking, Munch was wrong.

There is nothing at all foreboding about the Sewickley Hotel. The only thing foreboding around here is the number of times Munch refers to Munch's self in the third person. It likely indicates an imminent emotional breakdown. I'm sure you'll be reading about it.

In any case, the food at the Sewickley Hotel is little less than exquisite. The selections each seem to have about them at least one unique aspect; their presentation is superb, and the warm ambience made Munch anxious to retire to one of the fabulous homes down the street instead of to the Munch Cave, but that's not terribly germane.

The ambience, dominated by a long wooden bar but still fleshed out nicely with comfortable tables and booths, seems thick with history and the lighting is somewhat intimate. That combination was responsible for the reassurance Munch referred to previously. I guess it was the intimate lighting that caused the mistaken foreboding, but it made it hard for Munch to read the menu. And the menu is a trifle elaborate.

What, for example, is scared sea trout?

Oh, seared. Seared sea trout.

But what's this? Grilled cobra.

Grilled cobra! No wonder the sea trout is scared. This is roughly the extent of Munch's culinary expertise, the hazy notion that if the kitchen contains a pre-grilled cobra, it's likely enough to scare some fish. Or so it seems to Munch.

Turned out it was grilled cobia, which is a fish described by our friendly server as "between a swordfish and mahi mahi." That sounded more inviting and benign than "between a rock lobster and a hard place."

Friend of Munch had the grilled cobia and firmly pronounced it delicious. It came with an equally superior squash and sun-dried tomato chutney. Munch ordered the scared, uh, seared sea trout and found it not merely delicious but a singular taste phenomenon likely augmented by a pecan crust that pulled the whole thing closer to pie than fish. The menu said it was "infused with a velvety orange basil cream" and that, too, was just one heckuv an infusion.

The cobia was $19.95, the approximate midpoint for entrees. Crab cakes, for example, were $23.95 and were presented with "Low Country seasoning," which is good because there aren't many crabs in, you know, the mountains.

The Sewickley Hotel further offers a wide range of salads (from $4.95 to $15.95). The house dressing salads with dinner is a very special cranberry-orange concoction. The house salad includes cranberries and gorgonzola. Cajun turtle soup ($4.95) and steamed blue mussels ($8.95) highlight the appetizers list.

The overall menu is nothing if not ambitious, unless it's just the language. The hotel pate, for instance, is described thusly: "black olives, cornichons and crostini garnish, our velvety moosse truffle pate."

What?

Oh yeah, they're serious. And seriously good in a relaxed way. It's Munchnificant. See, Munch can write a little, too.

There are homemade desserts include a coconut creme pie that borders on the orgasmic. Well maybe not borders, but it's on the same regional map.

The Sewickley Hotel, 509 Beaver St., is open 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. for lunch and 5 to 10 p.m. for dinner. Closed Sundays. 412-741-9457.

E-mail Munch at munch@post-gazette.com.