We asked readers to take a stab at how they believe the final season of "Breaking Bad" will end. We discovered the show's fans are not squeamish, and some apparently have nicely warped senses of humor ("Newhart," anyone?)
Here's a sampling of their suggestions. If, as creator Vince Gilligan has hinted, there is going to be a "Breaking Bad" spinoff, maybe that will be our next readers survey?
• Just as Hank and the DEA surround Walter's house and begin breaking down the door, Walt, Skyler and Jesse each have a gun in their mouths and start to pull the triggers when ... the screen goes dark and silent for several minutes.
As the end credits start to roll, the picture comes back on, and Walter -- sans goatee and now with a full head of hair -- abruptly wakes up in a cold sweat in bed with Jane Kaczmarek. He looks at her and says, "I just had the strangest dream! I was a meth dealer in New Mexico!" She pats his back as Frankie Muniz walks in with a plastic bag full of blue crystal-like pieces and says, "Look what I found in the basement!"
The credits roll again as Journey plays in the background.
Guy Rusiski, 48,
• Hank starts putting 2 and 2 together and tries to turn Jesse. Lydia kills Jesse and Walter kills Lydia, but Walter has to run, leaving all the money to Skyler.
Mike Wallach, 66,
• OK, the most obvious answer will be that Walt figures a way for the feds to need information he has, like intricate details of the Mexican cartel (info gained off scene) and is a star witness and put in the federal witness protection agency. The show ends with him getting a new identity/name: Hal, he meets Lois, gets married and then season 1 of "Malcolm in the Middle" starts. Skyler and his two kids don't have anything the feds want. They aren't entered into the program.
Nate Loper, 40,
• I have it on good authority that during this final season, the entire Walter White/Heisenberg organization will successfully lobby the [New Mexico] state legislature to make Albuquerque a "Free Drug" zone where methamphetamine and other illegal drugs will be made available free of charge courtesy of our federal government to anyone who wants them. The "Org" can then operate successfully at ease and without fear of the feds as the government will be its only customer.
One caveat: Drugs must be consumed within the Albuquerque city limits -- outside they're illegal. Result: Without a profit incentive, drug trafficking at least in the U.S. and its associated crime evaporates and the user/losers enjoy their final days in the "Land of Enchantment." The cost of the program to taxpayers would be a mere fraction of the cost to continue futilely enforcing our current drug laws.
A happy ending, no?
Charles Jack, 69,
• Jesse, agonized by guilt, will engineer (perhaps by meth lab explosion) the death of himself and Mr. White.
Charlene Martz, 66,
• And finally, no happy endings, from Tom Petzinger, 58, of Squirrel Hill.
Walt holds a gun at his side, smiling gently.
"Son," he says.
Walter Jr. holds firmly to his walking crutch. His other arm shakes as he points a government-issue handgun at the head of his father. He speaks excitedly.
"Dad! I talked to Uncle Hank. Everything's good. Everything's OK!"
Walt remains tranquil. His son breathes loudly. Finally, Walt speaks again.
"You were born that way, son." He glances at his son's crutch.
Walter Jr. is exasperated. His crutch means nothing right now.
"Dad, Uncle Hank talked to the attorney general. In Washington! He says you are so big they could change the world because of you. Seriously change the world! And he says they will take care of you. He has the paperwork. We'll all be fine -- Mom and the baby and me. All of us!"
Jesse suddenly steps in from the dark. He is unarmed.
"All set, Mr. White."
Walt nods to Jesse, then resumes staring warmly at Walter Jr.
"I love you, son."
"Dad! It's over! We'll be OK!"
They continue staring as the camera pulls away and the scene fades to black.
A gunshot is heard. The series is over.tvradio
Maria Sciullo: firstname.lastname@example.org or @MariaSciulloPG. First Published August 11, 2013 4:00 AM